Finding Compassion in a World of Condemnation

LISTEN NOW instead of reading! >>>>>>
Listening / reading time: 12 minutes, 15 seconds
Glimmers is NOW ALSO AVAILABLE on iTunes.

Hover over image to share on Pinterest.

We live in a world that is quick to condemn and prone to instant reactionary judgment regardless of moral, ethical, religious, or political leanings. Of course, this reality is nothing new, but there are times when it seems far worse and more suffocating than others. The human tendency to react with judgment rather than curiosity, grace, and compassion has been our collective flaw since the dawn of time. And while this post is not at all about politics, but rather the pervasive temptation of condemnation across all facets of our lives, I’ve always been especially grateful that election season immediately precedes the holidays. The founding fathers selected early November because it followed the harvest period and generally came before the consistent arrival of winter weather. But God surely had a hand in giving them that wisdom because after months and months of public incivility, arguing, and communication saturation, we all need to hear the refreshing themes of “good will toward men” and “tis the season to be jolly.”

Liberal, conservative, spiritual, atheistic, wealthy, poor, straight, gay, married, divorced, traditional, or progressive, regardless of our beliefs and convictions, we are all equally capable of making harsh, rash and horribly inaccurate assessments, casting blame, and applying labels to others. If it wasn’t so damaging, the level of polarization on any side of human preference would almost be comical to observe from a neutral perspective. Like the song made famous by Bette Midler, if we could view ourselves from far, far away it would be so much better: “From a distance, we are instruments marching in a common band… From a distance, there is harmony and it echoes through the land. God is watching us, God is watching us … from a distance.” Though I love the fabulous Ms. Bette, she couldn’t be more wrong. God is indeed watching us, but He is certainly not doing it from a distance. As Jesus did when He walked the earth, the Holy Spirit is here among us, trying to work through us, and is mightily grieved by the judgmental, divisive, and abrasive words humans carelessly fling about as though we have an excuse or license to do so. 

Many Christians are fond of reacting to the all-too-common sin of condemnation by saying things like, “love the sinner, hate the sin,” and do their best to make it clear that they are adept at knowing the difference. But unfortunately, even a well-intentioned cliche like that has become horribly maligned and poorly received by the people who don’t believe they are sinning in the first place. That’s because the truth of the matter is, no one will feel that they are loved as long as you hate anything about them. Love and hate simply cannot co-exist in the same heart space. Embracing the attitude of this expression unintentionally, but inherently, links judgment to the action of loving. It makes offering the love conditional in some manner, no matter how much we argue that it doesn’t. We cannot effectively communicate the fullness of love to someone we disagree with if we are telling them that something they are doing is hateful at the same time. All they hear is the hate in our words, and miss our love, even if it’s really there. 

So for those who long to share the love of Christ with others, what are we to do? I’m not writing about this today because I have the complete answer to that question. Because I simply don’t. I only have some clues to share based on two fundamental truths Jesus taught plainly. First, He commands me to love others as I would myself. Second, God asks me to love Him with my whole heart and mind, which means I must try to live by the convictions of the Holy Spirit. As I seek to love Him that way, He makes it clear through His Word and His voice in my heart what He regards as holy, honoring, and pleasing to Him.

One clue I have in reconciling these two truths is that the focus of each is different. Did you notice that the focal point of the first commandment is others? When Jesus gave the command in Mark 12:30-31, He didn’t add any qualifiers to that statement. We are to love our neighbor, who can be any one of any lifestyle, persuasion, political leaning, or faith. On the other hand, the focus of the second commandment is me and my relationship with God. Not your relationship with God. Not my neighbor’s relationship with God, or lack thereof. The only human being on the planet with a heart that I can look into and evaluate is my own. 

The second clue I found in dealing with this conundrum is how Jesus reacted to people in his earthly ministry. I don’t think Jesus would have ever put a word that refers to a person’s eternal soul, a.k.a. the “sinner,” on the same weight and value as a word that refers to their earthly actions, a.k.a. the “sin.” Jesus loved people regardless of their sins, and He grieved over their sins. He even expressed sadness over the sin of those who would ultimately be responsible for His death on the cross. In Luke 13:34, Jesus said, “Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing.” When I read that verse, I hear longing in His voice, not anger or words of judgment. 

In story after story in the Gospels, we see Jesus embracing people caught up in habitual sin. The woman at the well. The prostitutes. The tax collectors who cheated people regularly. The woman caught in adultery. And so many more. Never once did He focus on their sins. Instead, He focused on loving them as people first. He knew that after they came to love Him in return, the Holy Spirit would deal with their sins in His time. Of course, it is important to note that He never condoned their sins either. And this is the uncomfortable truth about Jesus’ example that many people carry too far in justifying their own sins or excusing the sins of others. It is a very fine line and one that can only be walked in the power of the Holy Spirit. 

John MacArthur said, “Don't ever let your adoration of the doctrine of sovereignty crowd out God's compassion or replace human responsibility with some kind of fatalism. Jesus wept because of this unwillingness to believe. It grieved His heart and it should grieve ours as well.” Jesus demonstrated grief over those who were blind to the truth of who He was and His offer of abundant life. Jesus allowed people to reject Him. He never forced Himself on anyone. Instead, He grieved over their waywardness, stubbornness, and sinfulness. When we are truly allowing the love of Christ to saturate our hearts, the result is sadness, grace, and compassion for those who refuse to believe, are trapped in habitual sin, or lash out in pain. How can we demand Christian morality from people who don’t love Christ?  

For this reason, I think the phrase “love the sinner, hate the sin” should be banned from Christian vernacular and replaced with simply “love people to Jesus.” If we are truly loving people on their journey to Jesus, then we will grieve as Jesus did over their sin and respond not with judgment, but with compassion. Most importantly, we will be removing any personal responsibility for their sin from our vocabulary. Our actions should be contained to the realm of love, not hate. We cannot convict hearts. We cannot change people. Only Jesus can do that, and when they eventually come to Him, He will most certainly take care of their sins with expert timing and surgical precision. And we must resist thinking that what we believe to be the most egregious sins will be first on Jesus’ cleanup list. Letting Him do His work without our judgment is one of the hardest aspects of Godly love.

So when is it right to speak out about sin? The short answer is only when the Holy Spirit leads us to do so, and we better be very sure of that leading. Jesus demonstrated righteous anger when people committed atrocities in the name of His heavenly Father. He drove the moneychangers out of the temple because they were defiling God’s dwelling place, corrupting what is holy, and taking advantage of the faithful. He had strong words for those who prey upon innocent children, the weak, and less fortunate. Likewise, He spoke sternly and unequivocally against “religious” people wrapped up in hypocrisy, hard-heartedness, pride, and superiority. 

When we do consider sharing our anger or simply calling out someone’s sin, the first question to ask is whether or not the situation or person you want to address is within the church body or outside the faith. There is no question that God calls believers to hold each other accountable for sin, but there is a very specific, prayerful process the Bible gives us to follow when doing so. Here is a brief article on the topic from Lisa Harper.

With those outside of the faith, we look to Jesus’ example of leading them toward God gently with love and not judgment. If you suspect God might be leading you to speak out to a person or stand up for a cause, one of the key indicators is whether or not God is also calling you to take action. Words delivered without some kind of Spirit-directed action are rarely of God. Many of the world’s greatest movements to stop corruption, reform broken systems, and help those in need have been started by Christians called out by God to create change. On the other hand, carelessly flinging accusations, harsh rhetoric, and rants on social media do nothing to change society, unify believers, or stop corruption. Venting, accusing, labeling, and blaming don’t contribute anything but negative consequences, while Spirit-led action can change the world. 

One of Billy Graham’s most famous quotes happened in 1998 right after he had attended a dinner with Bill Clinton during the height of the impeachment crisis. When asked how he could behave so graciously to the President during the event, his response was simply, “It’s the Holy Spirit’s job to convict; it’s God’s job to judge; and it’s our job to love.” Until Jesus returns one day, the world will never be as it appears from a distance. And we will always battle the temptation to judge others. But by striving to do what God has asked us to do — and not the things only He can do — we can be purveyors of love rather than accidental carriers of hate.
***
If you like this blog post, why not invite others to read it, share it, and subscribe to my weekly emails? You will be encouraging them and you will be helping me share the love of Christ with others. It’s a win-win!

---