Remember back in school when all you wanted in life was to be like the most popular kid? You know, that guy or girl that every other kid secretly wanted to be? For most teens, an envy of this nature usually kicks in sometime during middle school and can last well into high school. I suffered from a jealousy complex in a big way. There was one girl in particular who mesmerized me. To my immature and very naive eyes, she appeared to have it all — beauty, brains, cool parents, the right clothes, a glittering social life, and dozens of ardent admirers, both male and female, who seemed to pivot on her every move. And it wasn’t until the beginning of my senior year when I finally realized all the time and energy I had wasted trying to get into her circle of friends. I finally began to understand that my identity was nothing like hers, nor could any amount of effort on my part change the perception of my classmates regarding my social status. I couldn’t fabricate the “it” factor or generate authentic coolness. The only thing I could be genuine at was simply being me. For any of us who’ve tried to be like someone else, the realization that we can only be who we authentically are is both liberating and utterly frightening.

It wasn’t until many years after high school when I finally made the connection between my struggle with personal identity and my spiritual maturity in Christ. Sure, I grew up hearing the expressions, “Just be who God made you to be,” or “God made you unique for His purposes,” but platitudes like those never seemed to make me feel any better following a party snub from Mesmerizing Girl or a searing rejection from my latest crush. What finally clicked in my brain and set me on a solid path to a healthy self-identity began germinating in my college years and didn’t fully bloom until my late 20s. What was it? Having fear. The right kind of fear, that is, which is described in Psalm 103:11, “For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is His steadfast love toward those who fear Him.” Another verse I love is Psalm 34:9, “Fear the Lord, you His godly people, for those who fear Him will have all they need.” That second part really spoke to me, because I had previously thought I needed to be like other people to find fulfillment in life. Yet God clearly indicated to me through those verses that if I learned what it was to fear Him and walk in fear of Him (Acts 9:31), I would never lack for anything.

The concept of fearing the Lord is mentioned hundreds of times throughout the Bible, with many of the verses praising those who do so. People who receive honor and blessing from God or other people are repeatedly labeled in both the old and new testaments with a specific identity… they are a particular category of people… they are called God-fearers. They are identified more by this spiritual trait than their jobs, their wealth, their families, or where they’re from. Perhaps most notable about their collective identity is that it is always mentioned in a positive light. This is remarkable in today’s culture because fear is commonly described as a negative emotion to avoid. When we read a verse like 1 John 4:18 which says, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love,” we scratch our heads and wonder about the apparent contradiction. Why would God ask us to fear Him to the point of being marked by the fear, and then tell us that we shouldn’t have any fears because of His perfect love?

One of my favorite analogies to help explain the difference between the negative definition of fear and the positive practice of living in fear of the Lord, is from CS Lewis’ classic story The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe. The hero who saves the day is the strong and powerful Aslan. In this quote from the book, Susan, who is one of the main characters, has asked another character, Mr. Beaver, to tell her about Aslan.

“Aslan is a lion — the Lion, the great Lion.” [Said Mr. Beaver]
“Ooh,” said Susan. “I’d thought he was a man. Is he quite safe? I shall feel rather nervous about meeting a lion…”
“Safe?” said Mr. Beaver. “Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn't safe. But he's good. He's the King, I tell you.”

When we think of Jesus as the Lion of Judah (Revelation 5:5), which is where Lewis got his idea for the character of Aslan, the first question that comes to our heads shouldn’t be, “Is He safe?” That question comes from our own need to feel comfortable and secure. Naturally, our first concern is us… what’s in it for us… and how easy it will it be to stay where we are or acquire what we think we need? But when we shift our perspective to who God is, our first response should be one of complete awe of His power, justice, and purity. On our own accord, by our own means or goodness, we could not survive standing in His presence. But, because God is also the source of perfect love and compassion, we can have no fear of anyone or anything else — not even death itself. Just as Aslan was mighty enough to destroy Susan or any other creature in Narnia, his nature of perfect love drove him to lay down his life for everyone else. As a result, Susan, her siblings, and all the others in the realm were offered protection from all fears and dangers, especially the evil White Witch.

William D. Eisenhower crafted the best explanation I’ve read regarding the paradox of fearing God as a path to experiencing a fearless life. In his 1986 Christianity Today article “Fearing God,” he said, “Unfortunately many of us presume that the world is the ultimate threat and that God's function is to offset it. How different this is from the biblical position that God is far scarier than the world …. When we assume that the world is the ultimate threat, we give it unwarranted power, for, in truth, the world's threats are temporary. When we expect God to balance the stress of the world, we reduce him to the world's equal …. As I walk with the Lord, I discover that God poses an ominous threat to my ego, but not to me. He rescues me from my delusions so he may reveal the truth that sets me free. He casts me down, only to lift me up again. He sits in judgment of my sin but forgives me nevertheless. Fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, but love from the Lord is its completion.”

As someone who has spent the majority of my life being afraid of something or someone, I long to grab ahold of Aslan’s mane and cling to him for dear life. I want to literally feel the breath from his fiery nostrils as he growls at my enemies. I want to see the muscles in his jaw ripple as he commands my fears to leave. But just as Aslan disappears at the end of Lewis’ epic tale and leaves the children with a promise of his presence, so God is asking me to humbly walk in daily awe of His power and trust in His perfect love to be with me, around me, and over me in any storm.
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Oswald Chambers, the 19th-century missionary and theologian, said, “It is the most natural thing in the world to be scared, and the clearest evidence that God's grace is at work in our hearts is when we do not get into panics. The remarkable thing about fearing God is that when you fear God, you fear nothing else, whereas if you do not fear God, you fear everything else.”

And so, we return to where we started at the beginning of this post. What does your personal identity have to do with the fear of the Lord? Romans 8:29 tells us that our goal as believers is to become more like Jesus. Each day, God is working on us — if we let Him — to transform us into the image of His Son. So that means any quality, character trait, or action that Jesus has or did while here on earth is worthy of emulation. Isaiah 11:2-3 describes Jesus as the coming Messiah this way, “And the Spirit of the Lord shall rest upon him, the Spirit of wisdom and understanding, the Spirit of counsel and might, the Spirit of knowledge and the fear of the Lord. And his delight shall be in the fear of the Lord. He shall not judge by what his eyes see, or decide disputes by what his ears hear…”

Reading those verses stopped me in my tracks. Fear of the Lord is mentioned twice in that short passage. If we are to become more like Jesus… if we are to be known by His name… then we will yield to the Spirit the way He did. Jesus delighted in the fear of the Lord. As if this isn’t mind-blowing enough, ponder the fact that God delights in the awe and reverence of Himself in the person of His Son. God loves us enough to show us how — through the sacrifice of His Son — to find the deepest level of satisfaction a human can ever know. As adopted sons and daughters of God, bearing His name and His identity, Proverbs 9:10 tells us, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight.” Having a strong identity in Christ is grounded in having a fear of the Lord.

What does all of this mean on a real-world, super practical, down-in-the-trenches level? When we’re actively walking in the fear of the Lord — through no power or effort of our own, but instead yielding to the work of the Spirit — we are far less likely to worry and future-trip, fly off the handle in anger, gossip and slander, harbor jealousy, cheat, or any other sin. Our awe of who God is — both for His justice and His incredible power — convicts our hearts, while the outpouring of His perfect love assures us that He will be with us every moment. We cultivate our fear of the Lord to live fearlessly for Him. Can we do it perfectly? Not even close. Will we have stops, starts, and backward progressions? Yes. We are not the Perfect One described in Isaiah 11. But we are human vessels for the Perfect One, so when we allow Him to shine through our weaknesses, others will see glimpses of fearlessness. Tiny visions of glory. Rays of hope. And they’ll want it too. Don’t be afraid to grab hold of the fear of the Lord. Is it safe? No. Is it good? Oh yes.

For Further Reflection and Deeper Study

• Take some time to reflect on your understanding of the fear of the Lord and what it means in daily practice. How has your perception of it changed (either from when you were growing up or when you first started following Jesus)? What statement or scripture from this message resonated with you the most and why?
• How have you let fears dominate your life? Which ones have plagued you the longest? How does the concept of fearing the Lord challenge your perspectives on the power and relevance of those fears? Google “verses about fear of God,” read a few of them, and then pick one that speaks to your heart to memorize. Pray it back to God and ask Him to make it real in your life.
• Developing a healthy practice of fearing the Lord brings with it many more blessings than just fearlessness. Based on the verses you just looked up, list out the benefits of fearing God. Which one of those benefits do you long for the most and why?
• If you like the CS Lewis stories and you’re looking for a daily devotional for your quiet time with God, consider this one: Walking Through the Wardrobe: A Devotional Quest Into the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe by Sarah Arthur. The book is primarily aimed at teens and young adults, but the author’s Biblical insights are deep enough to challenge even the most seasoned believer.​

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Every morning, in less than 30 seconds, I do something that has made me much healthier during cold and flu season: I take a whole-food-based probiotic. Yes, I know the research on probiotics is inconclusive at best, but based on my personal experience, there’s nothing anyone could say to convince me that my probiotic habit isn’t at least partially responsible for reducing my susceptibility to winter-borne illnesses that seem rampant this time of year. Simply put, I have a firm belief that has been put through the test for many years. And unlike all the inconsistent and often conflicting studies on probiotics and supplements, the critical role that belief plays in boosting my immune resistance is backed by scientific proof, of which, one of the most compelling is the placebo effect.

"The placebo effect is more than positive thinking — believing a treatment or procedure will work. It's about creating a stronger connection between the brain and body and how they work together," said Professor Ted Kaptchuk in a 2017 newsletter from Harvard Medical School. Kaptchuk specializes in research on the placebo effect. According to him, having a firm belief that a treatment will work can dramatically improve symptoms modulated by the brain, like the perception of pain. This means that worry and stress-induced symptoms and problems, as is often the case with insomnia and fatigue, have a direct correlation to what we believe. Furthermore, stress is a factor in 75% of all illnesses and diseases, according to the American Medical Association, so we all could benefit from learning how to harness the power of belief.

The key to belief’s power is its ability to control, restrain, and change the brain itself. When our bodies resist doing something (i.e. getting up earlier or working harder) it is our beliefs that drive us to overcome inertia and push toward a goal. The stronger we believe in something, the more likely we will directly affect our brain’s reactions and performance levels — for better or worse. So if we want to spend less time worrying and stressing, then we have no choice but to discover, learn, and reinforce the kinds of beliefs capable of transforming our minds. Of course, deeply entrenched and powerful beliefs are not created overnight. Whether good or bad, all beliefs are nurtured and grown over long periods of time, nourished on the water of experience and the food of daily habits and routines. So naturally, if we want to reduce our tendencies toward worry, anxiety, and stress, we have to start with belief itself. And there is no better place to begin than with Scripture.

Step 1: Understand what belief really is and how it works. Most people, even Christians, think that the verbs believe and hope are interchangeable. They’re not even close. Belief causes hope. Believing in God gives us hope. Hope without a rock solid trust that God will do what He says He will do and that He will do it personally and uniquely for you, is an empty hope. In fact, it’s more like a wish or a dream. No, the kind of belief capable of controlling your mind in the most dire circumstances, is one that unswervingly trusts that God is not only sovereign over your life (Proverbs 16:9), but He is also loving and powerful enough to be involved in — and in control of — every aspect of your days and years on this earth (Luke 12:6-7).
Here’s how a true belief plays out in real life. Something bad happens. Your belief system immediately kicks in to shape how your brain perceives the bad situation. Previous experience and your learned reactions based on your beliefs, compels you to an immediate reaction of some kind — either healthy or unhealthy, kind or mean, skeptical or optimistic. Your brain then begins to strategize next steps based on that framework. The older you get, the more likely you will respond and react more intensely in the same manner over and over. Yet here’s an incredibly empowering and encouraging fact — you have a choice to nourish your beliefs and re-engineer your mental framework. It’s hard. It takes a long time. But God guarantees your success. Romans 12:2 promises us the renewal of our minds, and 2 Corinthians 5:17 says we are a new creation in Christ.

Before you can proceed to step 2, therefore, you must take the time to really evaluate your beliefs. If you really believe God is who He says He is, then you will trust Him. And if you trust Him, then you will be motivated enough to put that belief in action by not worrying and stressing out. It will take time to learn to how to do this, to rewire your neural pathways, to submit to the Holy Spirit’s leading, and to give up your need for control. But don’t despair if you realize your belief is weak. If you recognize it and earnestly seek God in prayer, the Word, and worship, He will be faithful to lead you into a stronger faith.

Administering the Lifetime Cure
The rest of the prescription that cures anxiety, stress, and worry is outlined beautifully in Philippians 4:4-9. Again, it is not a quick fix*, but a lifestyle. Learning to live out this passage in your daily routines, habits, thinking, decision-making, and interactions with others will purify your heart, renew your mind, and completely overhaul your perspective. Here’s the passage from the New Living Translation:
“Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again—rejoice! Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the Lord is coming soon. Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.”

Step 2: Rejoice and give thanks continually. Yep, it means what it says it means. Do. This. All, The. Time. I even have a gentle, low-volume chime that goes off on the hour to remind me all day to turn to Him with a quick thought of thanksgiving and a 10-second prayer. When we discipline our hearts and minds to constantly acknowledge God, His rightful authority, and His generous hand in our lives — in every circumstance — we open the door for the Holy Spirit’s comfort, guidance, and encouragement. When we thank God, we reinforce our own humility and simultaneously honor Him above our own comfort, control, and pleasure. Peace and calm come from a heart at rest even on a stormy sea. Romans 8:28-39 says plainly that God is for us and loves us more than we can fathom. God doesn’t want us to be agitated, frustrated, stressed, anxious, or burned out. EVER. But experiencing the all-satisfying presence of God begins with praise, honor, and thanksgiving. Do whatever it takes in your schedule and habits to make this happen. Give God a chance to interrupt your day’s agenda, and He will do it. And you won’t be sorry.

Step 3: Pray, pray, pray. Notice that thanksgiving and rejoicing came before making petitions to God. That’s because praising and thanking Him will shift your perspective from yourself to Him. Then when you come into prayer time, the Holy Spirit has an open heart to work with and lead into the throne room. God wants us to lean on Him, depend on Him, and ask Him for help in our lives. 1 John 5:14-15 says that we can have confidence that He hears us and will respond. The more we seek Him for solutions, the greater our peace will overflow. When I have trouble sleeping, one of the practices that helps me the most is to turn every thought that races through my mind over to God and release its care to His oversight.

Step 4: Think about only that which is true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent or worthy of praise. The final step may be the hardest for some people, but if your brain were like a car, then this step is where the replacement parts get installed and the corroded ones get tossed out. This verse should be the master filter for all your thoughts. Every single one of them. If a thought comes into your head that isn’t true — not a speculation, exaggeration, or even a possibility — then deal with it appropriately, but don’t dwell on it. Whether it has to do with a person or a problem, pray for discernment, but don’t fret, stress, or worry over it. The same goes with the rest of the filtration words. We are called to meditate, ponder, and fix our minds on only things that meet the criteria of this verse. And while ugly, destructive, and discouraging things happen to us, we can choose what we allow to dominate our thoughts.

Genesis 50:20 reminds us of God’s guiding hand and faithfulness toward Joseph, even during times of extreme hardship, like attempted murder and slavery. “As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today.” And this is where belief undergirds everything. When life gets rough, we can apply this thought filter because we believe that God will work all that happens together for good (Romans 8:28), no matter how things appear — or feel — at the moment. It was more than two decades between the time Joseph was left for dead in a pit by his brothers and when God brought good out of the pain. Likewise, it may take a long time for you to see God’s hand in something difficult, but when you apply these steps faithfully despite your limited vision and in the midst of your struggle, God promises to give you the kind of supernatural peace, rest, and hope that the world around you will notice. And just like Joseph, many people may be kept alive — perhaps for eternity — all because of your willingness to obey and trust even when you couldn’t see. Hebrews 11:1-2 from The Message version says it so well: “The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It’s our handle on what we can’t see."

If you struggle with stress, anxiety, worry, or continuing frustration, be encouraged today that your tendency toward these struggles is NOT a sin. As human beings, we all have weaknesses. God does not hold you accountable for them. Rather, you are held accountable for how you choose to deal with them. Your Heavenly Father wants to use them to showcase the splendor of His Son alive in you. His plan is for you to depend on Him so much that you radiate Jesus through the cracks, broken places, and fault lines. The only question that remains is whether you’re willing to be a trusting vessel for His glory, or if you’d prefer to wear yourself out by trying to hide the flaws and patch up the holes with your own resources. For those of us raised with a DIY, perfectionist, or pessimistic mentality, the prescription from Philippians 4:8 seems to be the equivalent of a personality transplant. And in a way, it kind of is… little by little the Holy Spirit is transforming our minds to be more like Jesus. In the process, we will struggle. We will have setbacks. But as the peace and radiance of Jesus grows ever brighter, our longing and attachment for our old selves will grow dimmer and dimmer until we eventually don’t recognize who we used to be at all.

If you know someone struggling with anxiety, stress, or worry, please reach out to them in love and share this message of affirmation and hope with them. It may be the perfect thing they need to hear today and you are the only person who knows they need it.

*If you are currently taking medications (or need to consider getting medical treatment) to help you with anxiety or stress-related concerns, that doesn't mean that you are not relying on God. Keep taking the treatments you need, along with seeking spiritual growth through the application of principles from God's Word. Healing sometimes takes many months or years, and the Holy Spirit will guide you in the process.  He is faithful and He will see you through!

For Further Reflection & Deeper Study
Plus Resources to Help You Tackle Your Anxiety and Stress!

How were you raised to deal with and react to difficult situations and hardships? Can you recall the first time you remember feeling really stressed out or worrying a lot? Was a belief in God a factor in your upbringing or is inviting God into your daily thought habits new to you? How do you think your approach to handling stress and worry needs to change in light of scripture?

Consider approaching a friend who seems to trust God continually through trials and asking him or her to be an accountability partner. Get together over coffee and talk about the ways in which God is leading you to trust Him more and ask your friend to pray for you and check in with you on your progress.

If you are struggling with your belief and trust in God, turning your circumstances over to Him, and finding peace in your life, here are some resources you might want to explore.

Audio/Video Resources
Video Bible Studies on Anxiety on Right Now Media:
- Anxious for Nothing by Max Lucado
- Get Out of Your Head by Jennie Allen
Podcast - Cleaning Up the Mental Mess with Dr. Caroline Leaf
Audio Workshop - Overcoming Anxiety, Worry, and Stress Audio Workshop by Kim Stiver

Further Reading to Help You Beat Anxiety, Stress, and Worry
Believing God, Beth Moore — Direct and challenging, this book will help you get to the core of what you believe about God and whether or not you trust Him completely
Trusting God, Jerry Bridges — For a more theological approach to trusting God, this book is a classic for a reason.
Loving God With All Your Mind, Elizabeth George — Written for women, but applicable for everyone, this book teaches you how to apply Philippians 4 step by step.
Faith Is Not A Feeling, Ney Bailey — Written after a great tragedy in her life, this practical book will help you learn to trust even in the darkest of times.
Switch On Your Brain, Dr. Caroline Leaf — This revolutionary book explains the science behind rewiring your brain to overcome anxiety and negative thoughts. It includes a system for change.

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Thanks for reading today's Glimmers in the Fog post. If you liked it, why not share it with someone else who might be uplifted by it? And when you invite friends or family to subscribe to my weekly emails they also receive my free RADIATE eBook too!  You'll be encouraging them and you will be helping me share the love of Christ with others. It’s a win-win!

There is nothing I like more than — and despise at the same time as — falling asleep on the couch. While I do love that warm, soothing feeling of dozing off underneath my favorite fluffy throw while watching an episode of Friends on Netflix, I can hardly think of anything else so good that is simultaneously so burdensome. Why? Because finding the motivation after I wake up to move my lethargic body off the couch, march up the stairs, and get ready for bed feels as monumentally hard as asking me to climb Mount Washington in flip-flops.

Perhaps this is indicative of why I am not a napper. I’ve always wanted to be one of those people who could take a 20-minute cat nap and feel like a million dollars afterward, but instead I wake up feeling like a cat that got locked out of the house last night and got beat up by the neighborhood bully. So as much as I adore settling in for the night in my jammies on the couch, I’ve learned the hard way that when the battle of the eyelids sets in, I must resist with all my might and just go to bed whether or not what I’m watching or reading has concluded.

While the story of my couch battle is certainly one of life’s minor ironies, the spiritual battles within all of us are anything but minor and often stir up baffling contradictions of simultaneous love and hate. We often find ourselves startled when an internal battle swells up and threatens to take us back into old habits, sins, worry, or long-forgotten pain. That thing that we promised God and ourselves that we would never do again. That habit that comes back when we’re under stress, worry, or fatigue. That old wound that we find ourselves going back to revisit after many months of walking in freedom. No matter what the struggle is, we’ve learned the prescription for healing and victory in the past, but either we’re feeling too weak to execute on the remedy or we inexplicably give into willfulness or rebellion.

No matter our spiritual maturity or emotional intelligence level, we have ALL been there and we’ll all be there again. But at every point in our faith journey, we can find concrete encouragement and explicit instructions in God’s Word on how to overcome our battles and learn to love the Lord with all our hearts, minds, and souls. Out of all the fully human champions chronicled in the Bible, King David of the Old Testament and the apostle Paul in the New Testament were the best at confessing and verbalizing the spiritual battles waging within. Through the Psalms and most of Paul’s epistles, we find deeply relatable pleas for help and highly motivational tutorials for managing the war that wages between our fleshly desires and God’s best for us.

One of the many remedies God has directed me to use in effectively fighting internal battles is exercise. Like getting up from the couch after dozing off, some days it takes a seemingly gargantuan effort to make it happen. But yesterday I had an especially rare and alluring incentive — it was sunny and almost 60 degrees at my house. For those not familiar with Maine weather, trust me when I say that a temperature like that in early February makes a Mainer want to break out into the Hallelujah Chorus. And I just about did as I power walked the slushy, muddy roads in my neighborhood. On my turn back toward home, as I looked up at the sunshine filtering down through the tall evergreens, I suddenly realized how much the outcome of our battles is dependent on our perspective. Perspective isn’t just in our minds. It’s a battle plan for a victory already won.

Getting out for some exercise when I don’t want to do so, helps me develop the motivation and attitude I personally need to stay out of mental pitfalls. It also gives me the energy to finish my day strong. When I looked at the uncommon beauty and warmth spilling through the trees, I was reminded of the blessings and hope God gives me, versus whatever cold, uncomfortable, or dangerous roads I may be walking on at the time. As I snapped a quick picture of the scene above me, it was as though God whispered, “See what a difference it makes when you keep your thoughts focused up here, and not on the unfortunate conditions of the road you’re on?”

In Romans (chapters 7 and 8) 7:17-25 -- 8:1-2, Paul confesses about his own internal battles, reassuring us that even the greatest among us must continue to fight the good fight. Because The Message version of the Bible expresses it so profoundly, I’ve included Paul’s entire thoughts on the subject here. He says:

For if I know the law but still can’t keep it, and if the power of sin within me keeps sabotaging my best intentions, I obviously need help! I realize that I don’t have what it takes. I can will it, but I can’t do it. I decide to do good, but I don’t really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don’t result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time.

It happens so regularly that it’s predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God’s commands, but it’s pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge.

I’ve tried everything and nothing helps. I’m at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn’t that the real question?

The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.

With the arrival of Jesus, the Messiah, that fateful dilemma is resolved. Those who enter into Christ’s being-here-for-us no longer have to live under a continuous, low-lying black cloud. A new power is in operation. The Spirit of life in Christ, like a strong wind, has magnificently cleared the air, freeing you from a fated lifetime of brutal tyranny at the hands of sin and death.

The specifics of what we struggle with may change many times throughout our lives, but God is never content to stop peeling away the contaminated layers of our soul as He continually refines His workmanship. Each day on our journey here is one day closer to our final battle, which is already won for us. As I left for my walk, I was wrestling with a strong mental distraction, but the Holy Spirit lifted my head and reminded me that a view of victory was only a perspective shift away. No matter what skirmishes we encounter along the way, Jesus promises triumph for us in the day-to-day struggles of the heart and mind.

1 Corinthians 10:13 tells us that no sin or trial can overtake us without God providing a way of escape or the ability to endure it. And 2 Timothy 1:7 assures us that He has given us a spirit of courage, power, love, and self-control.

Our job is to simply believe those two perspective-changing promises enough to act on them. Keep going as if they are true… because they are. Take the next step believing God will deliver the escape, contentment, hope, peace, mercy, grace, and strength you need as you need it, even though you can’t see it or feel it now. Yes, it’s easier said than done, but the real hard work has already been completed by our Savior. Our temporary battles here are all won because of the eternal victory Jesus has already secured. A valiant warrior holding to the vision of a sure outcome is far more likely to succeed than even the bravest hero with a bleak perspective. And in God’s eyes, we are all warriors, armed with His power and might. “If God is for us, who can be against us?” Paul asks in Romans 8:31 and goes on to say in verse 37, “In all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.”

Some of the roads we’ll walk in this life will be slippery, unpleasant, and cold. We’ll be destined to walk some them over and over until we learn. But our loving Savior has promised that every step we take has the potential to bring us closer to Him. The choice of direction is ours, but the power to move forward is all His.

Questions for Reflection

• In what ways do you think you need to shift your perspective about some of the difficulties you face? What can you begin doing with God's help to better prepare for victory in your life?
• For every ache in our soul, there is a remedy in God's Word. Read Psalm 40 out loud while you think of the greatest battles you're facing right now. What do you sense God telling you about your struggles? What attributes of God described in this Psalm mean the most to you right now and why?
• If today’s message encouraged you in some way, please pause and ask God what He would have you do based on what you just read. In addition to some action step or change on your part, ask Him who He’d like you to reach out today with this same message of hope. Whomever He lays on your heart, please don’t hesitate for one second to begin praying for them. You could also send them this blog post with a personal note encouraging them. 

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This has been one of the hardest Januarys I can ever remember. That’s a surprising opening line for a message that’s supposed to be about optimism, isn’t it? With a beginning like that, you might expect me to launch into a list of reasons why the start of 2019 deserves that sad indictment, but instead, I will simply say that I cannot recall a period of time so intensely grief-laden for so many of the people I am privileged to call friends or family. And it doesn’t seem to be just my experience this month. A friend of mine recently attended three funerals in one weekend! Attending just one funeral in a month, whether it is in honor of your own loved one or that of a friend’s, is enough in itself to spark contemplation about the finite nature of our lives and launch us into a re-evaluation of what’s important.

As Christians, when we go through extended or unimaginably difficult times, we often wonder if it’s okay to show our weariness, vulnerability, and discouragement because we fear that our non-believing friends, family, and co-workers might see our melancholy and determine that the abundant hope of our faith has let us down. Even among other believers, we sometimes shy away from revealing our inner struggles with anger, depression, sadness, and disappointment — all because we don’t want any of them to think we’ve lost our hope or aren’t leaning into Jesus.

All of this contemplation has left me wondering… does God expect His followers to be optimists? All of the time? Some of the time? Is being a realist more realistic? And what about people who have a personality type that’s wired to be an outright pessimist? What should they do? As a community of believers, how do we encourage people to be authentic with each other even in times of great pain, doubt, or grief, without crossing the line into complaining, grumbling, and whining?

As I’ve been thinking about this, the concept of hope keeps coming to the forefront over and over. Last year, I had the privilege of hearing Cynthia Ruchti speak at a conference and I was riveted by the theme she uses for her life and her ministry: Hemmed in Hope. As she gave a bit of her testimony, I understood why that phrase has become her banner cry. No matter what hardship she has endured or will encounter in the future, everything that happens is within the boundary of Christ’s love and oversight. And for that reason, every moment of her life brims with hope. And from the little bit that I got to know her, I don’t think that means she wakes up everyday feeling cheery. But I’m willing to bet that she does wake up every day believing that no matter what occurs, God will whisper words of hope to her soul to not only get her through the day, but to help her reveal His hope to others.

But what does that kind of hope look like? How does it behave or emerge in the throws of everyday life? Clearly, hope is different than pessimism. But is it different than optimism or realism? Can hope even be compared to these, or are they apples and oranges? Rather than a lens or filter by which we view the world and the things that happen to us (or worry what will happen to us), I think hope is entirely something different. Hope is a companion. A partner. An enabler. Hope is the voice that never fails to tell us — as many times as we need to hear it — that no matter how grim the situation, we have a glorious destiny where every tear will be wiped away. The journey to our eternal destiny will present us with challenges, but our eternities will be perfect in every way. 1 Peter 1:3-4 says, “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, He has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you.”

Even with the promise of a guaranteed reservation at the ultimate resort of all time, most of us, however, have a very hard time “feeling” the hope of heaven when we’re down in the pits of the daily grind. I think most people, even those who claim to have no faith at all, believe in some concept of heaven. But the thought of eventually being restored to perfection in the afterlife doesn't seem to bring much comfort to most people in the middle of an earthly trial, like losing a loved one, going through bankruptcy, or watching your adult child make horrible choices. Many people miss out on the other immediate benefit of hope simply because they don’t ready themselves to receive it. Hope is offered to us continually because the Spirit of Christ lives in us every day. But most of us go through our lives as if the companion of hope doesn’t exist… that is until we hit a major roadblock. Then suddenly we want to feel all that hope offers, like peace and comfort, but we have no idea how to access it because we’re out of practice or we never learned how in the first place. Walking with hope takes practice. We have to learn how to receive and utilize the promises of hope by spending time with the Giver of Hope on a daily basis. Jesus specifically says in Matthew 11:29 to “learn from me… and you will find rest for your souls.”

The hope of Christ isn’t a magic spell. It can’t be activated only when we need it. Hope is something we cultivate deep within us that rises higher and higher the longer we pursue God and yield our need for control to Him. Hope changes our desires and perspectives. Hope doesn’t change what we see, like the lens of optimism or pessimism, hope changes us to withstand the journey this side of heaven with enduring joy, peace, and contentment. So the answer to the question at the beginning of this post, is surprisingly no. People who are hope practitioners on a daily basis are probably much more likely to be perceived as optimists, but Christians aren’t “supposed” to be any particular way other than what God is making them to be.

Christians aren’t “supposed” to be worriers either, but I have an anxiety disorder. And occasionally that causes me to be a pessimist. But little by little, I’m experiencing the brain-changing miracle of hope. Change only happens if I believe it can. Belief only happens if I trust. Trust only happens if I surrender. Romans 15:13 says, “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”As I practice the holy prescription that cures anxiety found in Philippians 4:4-9, God is transforming my mind according to Romans 12:2. And Philippians 1:6 in The Message version says, “There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears.” Now that’s a hope-filled promise we all can count on — optimists, realists, and pessimists alike — no matter what life brings us.

Questions for Further Reflection

• What are the dangers of being an optimist, a realist, or a pessimist? Which filter do you seem to gravitate to the most? Does it change when you’re under stress or emotional strain? Search for “Bible verses about hope” online and find one that speaks to your greatest tendencies.
• Read Psalm 71:14-16. What spiritual actions does the Psalmist take in order to help him to “hope continually”? Why are these so important in the life of a believer? Which one(s) is the Lord leading you to do more of today?

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Right now as I look out my window, a frozen landscape is greeting me and looking deceptively beautiful. Ice crystals are blanketing the evergreens and glistening in the sunlight, which is barely giving enough warmth to reach a double-digit temperature. And while there are hardy, winter-loving people who are probably frolicking in the snow under today’s clear blue skies, I’m enjoying the view without venturing away from the snuggly goodness of my roaring wood stove.

With the chilly, sparkling vista before me, it’s slightly difficult for me to imagine a lush green garden complete with just the perfect temperature and humidity for a peaceful stroll down a perfectly designed, wooded path lined with colorful flowers and serenaded by a majestic waterfall in the distance. If I dwell on the thought long enough, I might also be able to see a bench in the garden, waiting for me underneath an expansive shade tree and open to the widest view. Despite the extra strain on my imagination to concoct such a place in the middle of a Maine winter, I know the investment of time to get to the Garden in my mind is worth it. Worth every second… because I can leave all my distractions, fears, and worries far behind for a few precious minutes and focus on the most important thing in life. Most of all, it is worth it because of Who I’m meeting in the Garden, and because He and I have a standing appointment every morning with additional meetings scattered throughout the rest of the day.

I’ve written about heaven before, and while it’s a place we should contemplate often and draw comfort from, it’s not a place that we can access — or even fathom — during our time here on earth. On the other hand, the Garden is a place we can get to at any moment, and from any location. The literal Garden of Eden is long gone from earth, but I believe the existence of it and the fact that we were created for it, is emblazoned on our hearts. Our need for time in the Garden is interwoven into our souls. Somewhere deep inside of every human is a longing for the Garden — almost a kind of “knowing” that we don’t fully belong in our current existence, but rather that we should be dwelling in a deep, abiding fellowship with our Creator.

The problem is that most of us have either forgotten how to get to the Garden, are afraid of allowing ourselves to go there, or simply don’t make it a priority. We often choose instead to search for a counterfeit garden in our current surroundings, always wandering from valley to mountaintop and back again, only to find ourselves worn out, disappointed, and wondering why we cannot secure real peace, lasting happiness, or authentic contentment. We have yet to realize that only in the true Garden can we experience the wonder of being simultaneously on the mountaintop while walking through the valleys of life.

Humankind was created in the Garden and initially walked with God side by side in unbroken fellowship. We know this because Adam and Eve were clearly familiar with God’s arrival in the Garden in Genesis 3:8, and the previous chapters also make it clear that God had given them specific instructions and direction for daily living. But when they chose to trust in their own wisdom and defy God’s request, they could no longer exist in the presence of His pure perfection and holiness.  Forevermore, sin would come between the human race and its Creator unless atonement was made. Humanity may have been escorted out of the Garden, but the longing for the Garden has never been removed from our hearts.

In addition to the Garden of Eden it’s not a coincidence that Scriptures repeatedly mention gardens — both as literal places of great significance and as spiritual metaphors. Many of the Old Testament prophets used gardens as analogies for God’s restoration of His people following their repentance (for example, Isaiah 58:11). Just before His crucifixion, Jesus sought His Father’s help in prayer in the garden of Gethsemane (John 18:1-2), and then He triumphed in victory over sin and death as He was resurrected in the garden of Golgotha (John 19:41). Finally, we will experience God’s forever garden — paradise — when He returns for us as prophesied in Revelation 2:7. Astoundingly, we will be given access to the tree of life, which was originally established in the Garden of Eden.

Over and over throughout the Bible, we are reminded that God created us for garden living, and through the sacrifice and the atonement of Jesus, we can accept His personal invitation that beckons us: “Come to the Garden, my beloved. Come.” When we spend time with God in prayer, studying and meditating on the Word, and practice being still before Him in adoration and submission, we enter into the Garden.

One of my favorite hymns captures the essence of this invitation to us, and it has an interesting backstory. The hymn’s writer, C. Austin Miles, was a gospel singer and music publisher by trade, but one of his greatest passions was photography and developing his own images. One day in March 1912, he was waiting on some of his images to develop in his basement darkroom, so he passed the time by reading the Gospel of John. When he came to chapter 20, he began to let himself vividly imagine what it must have been like to be with Mary when she came to the garden the morning of Jesus’ resurrection. As he imagined what his own words might be to the savior, he was overcome with such emotion that he later said his hands and arms were trembling as he gripped his Bible. His real words came easily after that, and right there, in a cold, dark basement with not even a window, he penned the lyric for In the Garden. Miles once said of the popular hymn, “This is not an experience limited to a happening almost 2,000 years ago. It is the daily companionship with the Lord that makes up the Christian’s life.”

The other truth that overwhelms me about the story behind this hymn is the incredible role that Miles’ imagination played as he read John 20. Jesus calls us to love God with all of our hearts, minds, and souls (Matthew 22:37). And to endeavor to love Him in that way, we must be vulnerable and open to using all of our faculties to encounter Him and get to know Him better. We cannot love someone if we don’t intimately know them. The invitation from Jesus goes way beyond envisioning yourself in the Garden, it beckons you to find yourself in Him. Everything about yourself — what you’re made of, your dreams, your identity, and your very life — all found in Jesus.

As I ponder the hymn and listen to my favorite rendition of it, the word’s of its writer echo in my heart and remind me that Jesus is waiting and whispering to me, “Come to the Garden, my beloved. Put that distraction down and spend your time more wisely with me. Don’t wrestle with that hard stuff by yourself over there… come here with me instead. The empty thrills you’re seeking can never compare to the depth of my love and the satisfaction of spending time with me.”

Perhaps the most amazing thing about the Garden of prayer is that the gate into it is open 24 hours a day. Sometimes we are only able to linger there in short intervals, perhaps in the middle of a hectic workday or when taking a quick breath during a difficult conversation. Other times, we may rest in His presence for hours, wishing that moments like these would never end. Regardless of the amount of time, He just wants us to keep coming back consistently so we grow to be completely dependent on Him as our primary source of strength, peace, hope, and joy.

God intends for every day of our lives to include a Garden experience. And He takes delight when we show up. But like anything worth doing, the depth of our experience will take a lot of practice and mental discipline. For the longest time I just expected to feel transported into God’s presence from the moment my lips uttered “Dear God…” at the beginning of my prayer time. But being in the Garden with Jesus isn’t contingent upon anything I say. In fact, there are times when the Holy Spirit impresses upon me to say absolutely nothing. No, being in the Garden is more about what we do with our hearts and minds. It’s about a complete surrender of our wills, agendas, desires, fears, and worries. When we enter the Garden with open hands and a receptive heart, there’s no telling where He will lead us along the path of prayer and deeper into His presence. In the Garden anything is possible.

Questions for Further Reflection

• When we enter the Garden, Jesus wants us to be willing to lay down anything we shouldn’t be carrying around in our lives. The burdens of sin, distractions, and worries block us from fully hearing His voice and receiving His peace. What are some things you sense that He might be asking you to surrender to Him at the Garden gate?
• God has given us imaginations for a purpose that extend way beyond the fantasies of childhood. Do you ever use your imagination to envision being with Jesus? If not, what holds you back? Are you willing to try using it more in the coming weeks? You can learn more about using your imagination for God with this previous Glimmers blog post.
• Try spending some time imagining a walk with Jesus. It doesn’t have to be a literal garden scene. It might be your favorite place to hang out or your childhood playground. Wherever it is, take the time to let your vision fully develop. To get you started, you may want to watch this music video for The Garden by Kari Jobe.

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Have you ever noticed that when we refer to an unpleasant, difficult, or mundane task, we often imply that it has accumulated to a level that is beyond reason or fairness? From piles of snow and stacks of overdue projects to mounds of dirty laundry or mountains of bills to pay, there are times when life seems to be consumed by sky-high drudgery. No matter which metaphor you prefer, from gobs to loads, there’s not a human being who doesn’t make mountains out of molehills when it comes to things they dread doing.
In some ways, the worst part of grunt work is the anticipation of it. Just knowing something arduous is headed your way, whether its hours or weeks away, can become a heavy cloud over your mood or a huge weight on your shoulders until you get it done. When we know a task or uncomfortable situation is inevitable, we often struggle to enjoy being in the moment or even concentrating on what we’re doing right now. And if there’s any way the drudgery can wait, we may even fall into the trap of procrastination and then moan in misery when we realize that putting it off made it even worse.

So how do we find God’s glory in the grunt work of life? Scripture gives us very specific promises and clear direction in this matter because God knew that drudgery and mundane tasks would consume more of our waking hours that we would like them to. Sorry, I know that’s a very pessimistic thing to say, but stick with me on this topic because good and amazing things can come out of what we perceive to be miserable, but necessary uses of our time. Wherever your source of drudgery is usually found — in your job, home chores, family responsibilities, health problems, financial issues, etc. -- God’s design for your life includes miraculous transformation in every little detail.

In pondering my own snow and ice shoveling misery this week, God led me to see five steps toward glorifying Him even in the most annoying situations. But before we jump into those, it is important to understand the Biblical premise of transformation. In fancy Christian lingo, it is called sanctification. It’s a difficult word with an easy concept to grasp, but oh so hard to implement. It simply means the believer’s process in becoming more like Jesus. When we choose to pursue a life given over to His leadership, we enter the process of sanctification and are slowly transformed over time. 2 Corinthians 5:17 says all believers become a new creation in Christ. Sometimes, however, the fruit or outcome of this transformation is hard to see. Sanctification is the spiritual mystery we must believe is at work at all times in every Christ follower, even if we can’t see the evidence immediately.

What’s so fascinating about sanctification is that its transformative work occurs in two different ways. First, the Bible promises that we are continually being transformed as we let the Holy Spirit work in us. Second, any task we perform is an opportunity for sanctification, no matter how exciting or mundane, and is inexplicably and often invisibly transformed into an act of divine glorification. And guess what? When we are glorifying God, misery becomes magnificence. This may seem like an impossibility, but for these five steps to work, we must begin by believing that God not only makes all things possible but that He can also transform the most common things on a daily basis.

Step 1: Embrace God's direction 
1 Corinthians 10:31 gives us this command, “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” This verse isn’t hard to understand, although many have tried to make the interpretation of it complicated. It means what it says. It means everything you do — from giving someone a hug to cleaning toilets — do it all as for the Lord. Perhaps not as obvious, but as vitally important, it also means that it is indeed possible to glorify God in everything we do. It is possible to experience His glory all day long.
People often wonder what God’s will is for their lives, but they fail to start with the most basic direction from Him. In order to obey this command, we must embrace God’s foundation of truth. When we embrace someone or something, we go far beyond resignation, way past acceptance, and plunge headlong into passion. Jesus was passionate about conquering the sin in our lives with His sacrifice, and in the power of the Holy Spirit, we can humbly surrender our desires, stubbornness, and resentments to Him. 

Step 2: Shift your perspective
There are no shortcuts on this step because it takes practice to continually ask God to shift your perspective and give you the eyes to see your situation from His point of view. For example, God may look at a stack of dirty dishes as a character builder or a humility generator, but you just see it as something your spouse forgot to do. Your perspective will make you grumpy with each crusty dish that goes into a time-consuming soak. God’s perspective yields sanctification. Yours would only yield frustration. Romans 8:28 says God works all things… ALL things … for His glory. Brother Lawrence, a monk who learned to communicate with God virtually every waking moment no matter what he was doing, said, “The difficulties of life do not have to be unbearable. It is the way we look at them — through faith or unbelief — that makes them seem so. We ought not to be weary of doing little things for the love of God, who regards not the greatness of the work, but the love with which it is performed.”

Step 3: Continually confirm and communicate
1 Timothy 4:4-5 says, “For everything created by God is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, for it is made holy by the word of God and prayer.” This is such an instructive verse. Everything received with gratitude to God is transformed through the power of Scripture and a prayer of surrender. When we continually go to the Word to confirm our validation and direction and then follow that up with constant communication with God through prayer during every task, we can have complete trust that He will use anything we do for His purposes.

Step 4: Use Your Imagination
Since God said He will transform every task, then imagining how He might choose to do so is not only a way of praising Him, but it will also help pass the time during an especially boring or long task. Divinely directed visualization is encouraged in Scripture and not many adults know how to do it or are comfortable with the concept, but when you combine imagination with prayer, you open up your heart and mind to see the impossible. 1 Corinthians 10:33 instructs us to do everything with love towards God and others, knowing that every moment is an opportunity to encourage others and point them to the love of Jesus. (Read more about using your imagination for God in this post.)

Step 5: Receive the promise
Jesus’ sacrifice guarantees that we will find more than we ever imagined by letting Him lead our hearts and lives. Colossians 3:23-24 says, “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.” Although we are to offer everything up to God solely because we love Him, Scripture makes it clear that He will reward us for doing so. When the going gets tough, we can rest assured that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. There is always a reason for the struggle. We have the reward of hope in every task and in every moment.

Oswald Chambers said, “If we will arise and shine, drudgery will be divinely transformed. The inspiration of God is required if drudgery is to shine with the light of God upon it. When the Lord does something through us, He always transforms it.” So next time you’re facing that mountain of misery, take God at His Word, pray your way through it, and then watch it transform into a gift of glory.

For Further Reflection
For those of you who use these weekly posts as devotional content, I’ll be including three reflection questions from now on. Consider writing your answers down in a notebook or journal so that you can capture your journey with Jesus. Recording your prayers, praises, and progress is not only an effective way of preventing spiritual drift, but it will also encourage you during hard times.

• How have you seen God transform mundane or miserable tasks in your life? Which ones do you need His help with right now?
• What scripture verse jumped out at you today? Why do you think God has brought this to your attention?
• Which of the five steps do you need to work on the most? What do you think God is leading you to do next? 

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As the last of the autumn leaves fall and Thanksgiving fast approaches I start thinking about Christmas movies. There is about a dozen I watch almost every year without fail. Just as holiday music warms up the chilly days, I can’t imagine December evenings without these timeless stories. As I pondered which one I would watch first after Thanksgiving, I realized they all seemed to have a common theme, and it wasn’t what I expected. It wasn’t believing in magic or miracles, finding true love, having a cheerful spirit, or even learning to be kind to others. All of those important reminders are present in many of the movies, but one truth spoke loudly and clearly above all else — a transformative surge of thankfulness always precedes an explosion of Christmas joy.

Regardless of the genre — from musicals to comedies — or the era in which the movie was produced, the main character’s problem is always solved once he or she comes to an intensely humbling realization of gratitude. Just take a look at these famous storylines:

• The Grinch hates the inhabitants of Whoville, their noisy traditions, and their festive spirits. But when the entire village bursts into a joyous celebration fueled by an infectious gratitude for each other despite losing everything else, the Grinch’s cold attitude is melted forever and he is flooded by thankfulness himself.
• George Bailey has had a hard life. He gave up his dreams to sacrifice for everyone else and now he’s having a pity party. When an angel gives him a glimpse of what the world would be like without him, George is overwhelmed with gratitude for the life he’s been given, his friends, and his family.
• Ebenezer Scrooge is a self-centered, bitter, and greedy businessman. When three ghosts show him that his life has no life in it at all, he is brought to his knees with appreciation and begins living abundantly by serving others.
• When eight-year-old Kevin has had enough of his large family and being picked on, he wishes that they would all go away and leave him alone. He gets his wish, but in the process learns to be thankful for his big, imperfect family after all.
• Clark Griswold just wants a pool in the backyard. But when his boss destroys his dreams by withholding Clark's Christmas bonus, desperation pushes him to the brink of stupidity. On the verge of losing everything he thought mattered most, Clark is overcome with gratitude when he realizes all the blessings that truly matter.

Discovering gratitude is the key that unlocks the door to joy because of what is required by its transformative work. Being truly thankful for something or someone requires the humility to acknowledge that we don’t deserve the amazing blessing of whatever it is. Genuine thankfulness also requires self-forgetfulness. We cannot fully appreciate a blessing without letting go of our own self-interest and self-absorption. As long as we are more interested in ourselves, our personal welfare, and our own problems, we will never be able to even see the blessings that flood our lives every second of the day.

Authentic, deeply felt gratitude also requires vulnerability and meaningful connection. And while these factors are closely related to self-centeredness, they often elude us because of pride. No one likes to appear weak, needy, or less than perfect, so our pride prevents us from seeing the value in being vulnerable with the people who love us the most. Sometimes it even prevents us from forming relationships at all. We don’t want to risk getting hurt or rejected, so we don’t reach out or take the time to have a conversation with a stranger. And to numb the gaping void in our hearts, we tell ourselves that we don’t need someone or that they don’t care about us anyway.

Sure, movies are generally unrealistic and our inner cynics might be tempted to utter, “Bah-humbug,” under the weight of holiday chores, pushy crowds of shoppers, commercialism, and whatever other problems are going on in our lives. But the fact that gratitude paves the way to joy is undeniable, and I believe God specifically designed it that way. While the plot lines I mentioned don’t lead any of the characters to God directly, they all point to truth. They all pave a path in the heart to be humbled, thankful, and more open to receiving the ultimate gift at Christmastime — the Christ child. Having a spirit of thankfulness is a prerequisite for realizing that we all need the gift of Jesus. Gratitude generates warmth, pliability, and tenderness. Without it, a heart can grow colder and more cynical with each passing year of trials, rejection, and disappointments. Eventually, it can become as frigid and impenetrable as an icy windowpane, forever seeing life through a cold lens of hopelessness, bitterness, isolation, and no longer able to warm to the touch of another or feel the movement of the Spirit.

The sense of urgency that infuses most Christmas stories makes their storylines even more powerful. The main character needs to be saved by gratitude, a.k.a. the Christmas spirit, before it’s too late. Time and time again, a rush of gratitude at the last moment pulls him or her from the brink of disaster and reveals a new way forward. As believers in Jesus, the holiday season presents us with that same urgent reminder. And Thanksgiving is the first step in tenderizing the heart for the days ahead and announcing to the world that the clock has begun ticking down toward the greatest gift we will ever receive. If Thanksgiving were a person, I think it would be John the Baptist. He would stand on the doorsteps of our hearts and proclaim at the top of his lungs, “Prepare the way for the Lord, make straight paths for Him.” (Matthew 3:1-11) In other words, “Take the time to prepare your hearts for Jesus. Start right now by being thankful for the abundant blessings of God that flood your life on a daily basis. Open your eyes to see God’s goodness so that you will be able to see the Truth when He arrives.”

Randy Alcorn says in his book God’s Promises of Happiness, “God isn’t just in life’s monumental moments. He’s present in raindrops, in the artistry of spiderwebs, the sound of an acoustic guitar… a child’s laugh … a dog’s wagging tail… If we disregard these and thousands of other gifts, we don’t just fail to notice them, we fail to notice God.”

As Bing Crosby so famously crooned in White Christmas,
“When I'm worried and I can't sleep
I count my blessings instead of sheep
And I fall asleep counting my blessings.
When my bankroll is getting small
I think of when I had none at all
And I fall asleep counting my blessings.”

It’s as timely of a reminder today as it was when the movie debuted in 1954 — no matter what the holiday season brings this year or what state you find yourself in, your heart will find joy and peace in the act of being thankful. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 says, “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” Philippians 4:6 also makes it clear that thanksgiving to God precedes the gift of peace. Everyone talks about peace during the holidays, but few people practice what is needed to truly experience it.

Memorializing Thanksgiving Day by expressing gratitude to those sitting around the table is common, and formally thanking God before diving into the endless food is generally accepted even in families that don’t regularly pray together. But this holiday is capable of being so much more than a fleeting moment of appreciation or a ritualistic prayer. It offers us a spiritual doorway to the Advent season, not so unlike the magical portal in the movie The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe. It beckons us to warm our cynical minds and weary souls by the fire of gratitude and make our hearts a ready home for the coming King.

Wishing you and yours a beautiful and soul-stirring Thanksgiving!
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If you could print out and read a transcript of your thoughts for the last 24 hours, you may be shocked at what you would discover. According to the prevailing research, you would see that anywhere from 47 to 80 percent of your waking moments were spent thinking about something other than what you were doing at any given time. And just what were you likely thinking about most of that time? Answer: something that occurred in the past or might happen in the future.

When I heard these statistics, I wasn’t surprised to learn that my mind wanders while doing routine tasks. After all, who doesn’t daydream while doing the dishes or taking a shower? What was most shocking was the realization that my mental wandering, like most people’s, was largely focused on matters that aren’t real or valuable. Even worse, our minds are often focused elsewhere even when we are doing non-routine tasks, like working or having dinner with friends.

Other than the obvious downsides, such as not fully applying ourselves to the task at hand or really enjoying the moment, constantly thinking about something in the past or future has far more dangerous consequences. That’s because our recall of past events is highly distorted and our thoughts concerning the future are usually worry-driven. A 2012 study from Northwestern University was the first to demonstrate that memory is like the telephone game — each time an event is recalled it becomes altered in some way. And eventually, it’s nothing like the original.

Our speculation about the future is even worse. A study in the journal Clinical Psychology & Psychotherapy concluded that 97 percent of what we worry about either won’t occur (85 percent) or is something that we’ll be able to handle and even learn from (the remaining 12 percent). One HuffPost contributor summed it up this way, “This means that 97 percent of what you worry over is not much more than a fearful mind punishing you with exaggerations and misperceptions.” What’s more, just the activity of worrying causes physical harm to our bodies. So, if even something bad IS going to happen, fretting over it will only make it worse 100 percent of the time.

But this post isn’t about living in the past or dwelling on tomorrow specifically — it’s more about the concept of being present in the moment and focusing on what God has appointed you to do at any given time of the day. So, if you’re one of those who people who think about solving a work problem or dreams about your upcoming vacation while you should be actively listening during a conversation with someone else, then you’re getting roped into this topic as well.

Jesus was all about being present and fully engaged with every task and every person He encountered — for one purpose only. He was here to accomplish His father’s business, and He let nothing — not even His own mind — distract Him from doing the work at hand for the glory of His Father. When Jesus was just 12 years old Luke 2:49 tells us that He already understood His purpose. After his parents found him interacting with scholars in the temple, He said to them, “Why did you seek Me? Did you not know that I must be about My Father’s business?”

I know, I know, you’re probably having the same reaction as me — this is Jesus we’re talking about and I don’t even come close to having a ninja mind. I so get it. Focusing on the person in front of me is hard, especially when they’re babbling on and on or whining about the same thing all the time. Keeping my mind from worrying about everything, from my health to work projects, is a battle. And dwelling on past hurts or wanting to relive the good times is always a lingering pest. But as God’s workmanship, He wants to refine us more every day to be like His Son, which means we should be getting better and better — albeit ever so slightly, perhaps — at focusing on His purposes one day at a time.

Jesus knew that our minds would struggle to experience life on a moment by moment basis, trusting both our past and our future to God’s care and direction. To the future trippers out there, Jesus says in Matthew 6:34, “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” For the past dwellers, we read in Isaiah 43:18-19, “Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” And for anyone who struggles with being fully immersed in God’s purpose and staying focused on the people and tasks He puts in front of us, we read this amazing verse combination. “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.” (Proverbs 19:21) “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.” (Colossians 3:23-24)

Of course, these mind-mastering commands from the Bible are extremely difficult to implement, and we can be tempted to just throw our hands up and give in to distracting thoughts. But like any discipline or exercise, the key is to take it one step at a time. The mind is like a muscle, and its plasticity is reshaped and improved gradually by repeated practice, not a sweeping instant transformation. Each step teaches us to lean on the power of the Holy Spirit for the next step. Hebrews 12:11 says, “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” In other words, the process of learning how to be focused in each moment on the persons and tasks God has given you is a lot of hard, uncomfortable work, but if you stick with it, over time your increasing discipline will result in a harvest of blessings.

Habits like dwelling on old losses, not really listening to people when they talk, and giving into worrisome, speculative, or negative thoughts took many years to form in our brains. But the Holy Spirit is ready to do some mental rewiring in your life if you’re willing to practice. Like young Timothy, Paul tells us in 1 Timothy 4:15, “Practice these things, immerse yourself in them, so that all may see your progress.” Paul didn’t mean that Timothy should do it so that people will shower him with compliments, but rather to show the glorious transformation of what God can do when He’s allowed to freely work in His child’s life.

Paying close attention and being fully immersed in whoever or whatever God places in your path on a daily basis isn’t always pleasant. In a world where it seems as though everyone is suffering from FOMO (fear of missing out), slowing down and focusing on the moment and the people you’re with can seem impossible to do. But remember that God is timeless. He operates outside of time. He created time itself. And while we are bound within it, He moves without any of its constraints. So when scripture tells us that He has a plan and a purpose for everything under heaven, we need to suspend our flawed human perspective and grasp of the universe, to believe that in our everyday, ordinary lives the King of the Universe is working for us, not against us… regardless of our timing. And if He can give us His miraculous attention, then the least we can do is be patient and trusting enough to let Him finish His work.
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Those of you who have been reading the Glimmers blog for a while know that I often write about my own spiritual wrestling matches with the ups and downs of life. I figure if I'm struggling with something, then there must be someone else who could benefit by hearing my stories. Most importantly, I pray people see a glimpse or hear a whisper from the One who is waiting to be discovered amidst the stuff of everyday life.

That’s the calling and driving passion He’s ignited in my heart and asked me to spend my time, energy and resources pursuing. And while this path is at times exciting, sometimes the effort, requirements, and complexities surrounding it spill over healthy boundaries, rushing in like a cresting river in my mind at the most inconvenient times … for instance, when I need to be sleeping. In fact, I struggle more with sleep now as a fledgling full-time writer than I ever did when working insane hours in a high-stress corporate career. And I’ve come to understand that’s because my calling doesn’t have any of the usual structure or familiar routines associated with a company environment.

No, it’s just me and God on a wild frontier, and I don’t know where He’s taking me. It’s the most incredible adventure and opportunity of my life, yet it is also the scariest. Since James 3:1 says, “We who teach will be judged more strictly,” I pray daily that what the Holy Spirit speaks will rise above the noise, assumptions, prejudices, and weaknesses of my mind. When the father of lies starts whispering to me and reignites the fears in my heart, I often wake up in the middle of the night ready to throw in the towel on this whole thing. After many nights of lying awake feeling panicky and completely inadequate — I am finally starting to understand something critical. Unlike a career, a God-calling only comes to fruition when it operates entirely under His hand and for His glory. I knew this intellectually, but I am just now coming to understand this truth on a heart level. And this new depth of understanding rose out of my struggle, not at a time when I was feeling confident, successful or satisfied.

When we go through trials in our relationships, our health, our jobs, or even something like the election results, our hearts, minds, and souls long to be soothed. For example, the other night when I was over-the-edge frustrated with trying to convert my new devotional eBook to a Kindle-ready format (don’t get me started on that one!), I sought out a soothing release in the wrong place — lots of chocolate and a saccharin Hallmark movie. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with chocolate in itself, but neither it, or the ridiculously unrealistic movie, did anything to help me sleep that night. It got my mind off my struggles for a while, but once the sugar therapy had worn off both mentally and physically, I still woke up with my brain running a million miles a minute. In the middle of the night, it’s funny how we all erroneously tend to think that the world’s problems depend on us and everything is all about us. That’s how Satan works his best lies on us. They are born and bred on a foundation of self-centeredness.

But instead of letting his nasty tricks twist me up this time, I turned to the only soothing word that doesn’t wear off. The second time I woke up in a mental spin class, I ran to THE Word, and the most miraculous thing happened — after a little session of saturating myself in it and yielding to its effect, I fell into a deep, much-needed sleep. When morning came, I bolted out of bed with thoughts about the multi-faceted and incredible power of the most soothing Word in the world.

Some of you might think of the Bible when I say, the “Word.” Others think I’m referencing Jesus… or the Holy Spirit… or God. Well, it’s all Him. And that’s what has me spellbound in a whole new way today. The Word in its all-encompassing, harmonious nature is alive, relevant, and fresh every day. John 1:1-5 so beautifully explains this mystery:
In the beginning the Word already existed.
    The Word was with God,
    and the Word was God.
He existed in the beginning with God.
God created everything through Him,
    and nothing was created except through Him.
The Word gave life to everything that was created,
    and His life brought light to everyone.
The light shines in the darkness,
    and the darkness can never extinguish it.

Because Jesus is the Word, and Jesus is God, and God’s Spirit inhabits the Word, which is alive, dwelling in us, then the Word is life itself. And if we want that life, then we need to take all of it in. We can’t expect to be fully soothed, calmed, cheered, strengthened, satisfied, or healed when we only partake of a mere slice of it. God calls us to receive, experience, and nurture a relationship with all of Him. Life-boosting, deeply satisfying relationships don’t happen in pieces.

John was inspired to call this all-encompassing nature of God the Word because, according to John Piper, “He had come to see the words of Jesus as the truth of God and the person of Jesus as the truth of God in such a unified way that Jesus himself — in his coming, and working, and teaching, and dying and rising — was the final and decisive message of God.” God sent the message in the person of His only Son, who in turn, left His Spirit to dwell in us.

To thrive spiritually, mentally, and physically, God has provided the Word to impact every area of our lives. Like food and water, human beings were simply not designed to function without it. When you sin and fail, the Word is like an antibiotic salve, capable of treating the most infectious spiritual bacteria running rampant in your life. When you struggle or cry out in pain, it’s the soothing balm for your frazzled mind and wounded heart. When you long for something or seem to be waiting endlessly, the Word offers true satisfaction and endless patience. When you feel overwhelmed, hopeless or lost, it delivers hope, reassurance, and direction for every decision. Like a breath of fresh air in a toxic haze, the Word brings clarity to our lives.

While sitting at a community well with an outcast, Jesus said in John 4:10, “If you only knew the gift God has for you and who you are speaking to, you would ask me, and I would give you living water.” In every frustration, every need, every decision, the Word beckons us, saying to us over and over the same thing, “If you only knew the gift God has for you.” Lamentations 3:22-23 reminds us that this life is not to be lived without the covering, grace, and strength of God’s mercy. “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.”

Jeremiah 2:5 warns us that when we seek worthless idols, we will become worthless ourselves. That doesn’t mean God won’t help us or doesn’t love us, but it does mean that we will be rendered useless for His kingdom. So, whatever your world looks like today… whatever challenges you face… whatever hurt you feel… the well of the Word is waiting for you. The Holy Spirit is ready to help you draw from it, if you’re willing to use the bucket He offers and then fully digest its contents into your life. But holding the bucket isn’t possible until you drop the idols from your hands. The Word can only be embraced with open hands and a willing heart.
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Patience is not in the Book of Virtues. Literally. When a reader of my blog recently asked me to write about patience, the first thing that came to my mind was the old adage “patience is a virtue.” But when I pulled out my copy of William J. Bennett’s brilliant compilation of writings on ten timeless virtues, patience — to my surprise — was not one of them. 

Searching the internet to find Mr. Bennett’s rationale behind leaving out the most commonly referenced virtue of them all yielded nothing. Not a single clue regarding its mysterious absence. So I began to speculate why he left it out, and eventually landed on this conclusion: patience is more like a skill than a virtue. Like a trusty, well-used tool, deeply refined patience is the key to unlocking many other virtues. For example, without patience, it’s not possible to fully generate the virtues of compassion, self-discipline, loyalty, and perseverance. (All of those are in Mr. Bennett’s book, by the way.) Sure, we may show trace amounts of these virtues, but they will never completely bloom to have the impact we desire unless we have acquired and practiced the primary skill of patience.

Patience, however, is not a simple tool. Rather it is a complex, multi-use instrument, more like a pocketknife than a hammer or scissors. The patience required while sitting in heavy traffic with a sea of rude drivers is very different from the kind of patience needed while waiting on a dream to come true. Because I have recently written about growing through seasons of waiting (see this post), my focus here will be on the art of mustering patience with frustrating people and irritating situations. But, of course, learning how to have patience in this arena will help anyone exhibit more of it in the many other aspects of life.

Learning to gracefully and compassionately manage our daily frustrations with life and with people — both the ones we love and the ones we can’t imagine loving — is a rapidly dwindling skill in today’s digitally driven culture of instant gratification. According to the Pew Research Center people under the age of 35 have far less patience than previous generations, largely driven by our “hyperconnected” society and its emphasis on immediate satisfaction. Since I am well beyond that under-35 bracket and struggle mightily with patience, these kinds of research reports seem especially alarming.

But regardless of our society’s normalization and increasing promotion of instant gratification, the ability to practice patience is worth fighting for, now more than ever. And the very first step in that fight is to change our very flawed and highly negative perception that cultivating patience is an unpleasant and arduous endeavor. To be blunt: we need to stop thinking about patience as if it is a pain in the butt. When in fact, the process of patience itself is a treasure hunt for the truth accompanied by an invitation from God.

To explain that statement, consider this powerful example from the art world. Harvard art historian and professor, Jennifer L. Roberts, has a brilliant requirement for all of her students. Before they begin writing a research paper on a particular piece of art, they are required to go see it in a museum or gallery and observe it for three hours straight. That’s right, they have to stay in one place for three hours and gaze at the painting or sculpture. She said in an article, “The time span is explicitly designed to seem excessive … At first many of the students resist being subjected to such a remedial exercise. But after doing the assignment, students repeatedly tell me that they have been astonished by the potentials this process unlocked. It is commonly assumed that vision is immediate. It seems direct, uncomplicated, and instantaneous—which is why it has arguably become the master sense for the delivery of information in the contemporary technological world. But what students learn in a visceral way in this assignment is that in any work of art there are details and orders and relationships that take time to perceive. What this exercise shows students is that just because you have looked at something doesn’t mean that you have seen it.” The article entitled “The Power of Patience” is so fascinating, I encourage you to read it in full.

So instead of viewing patience as something that requires waiting, we would do much better to value it as a means to see truth and then react with grace and love. That’s the invitation extended to us every day, whether we’re fighting irritation in traffic or struggling to be patient with a stubborn child. Patience is not at all about learning to kill time with a pleasant demeanor, it is about learning and then reacting with compassion to the truth that is revealed.

Like the art history requirement, imagine if you had to sit at a stoplight for three hours. What would you see? Well, you’d see nothing if you let frustration, anger, and resentment cloud your vision. But if you approached it as a way of seeing the truth with an invitation, you might notice the homeless person standing on the corner. With three hours at the light, would you look into her eyes and venture to have a conversation with her? You might also notice the old man in the car next to you and the deep lines of sadness across his leathery face. Would you roll down the window and ask how he’s doing? What about the punk young adult in the lowrider blaring loud music behind you? Instead of being angry that he’s been riding your bumper for the last five miles and assuming that he would cut you off given the chance, would you get out of your vehicle and ask him what his big dreams are? What would you notice at the stoplight if you had to be there for three hours?

Josiah Royce, the American philosopher, said more than a century ago, “What is then thy neighbor? [Your neighbor] is a mass of states, of experiences, thoughts, and desires, just as real as thou art. Does thou believe this? Are thou sure what it means? This is for thee, the turning point of thy whole conduct towards him.” Belief is required for the cultivation of patience. Whether someone is an atheist or deeply spiritual, believing that there is always a greater truth or another layer to be revealed about someone or a situation is required for anyone to have patience. A casual glance or a quick assessment will never reveal what’s really going on in someone’s life or in a situation, so at the pace life moves, why do we assume the worst and get irritated? Hanging out at a traffic light for three hours isn’t likely to happen, but believing that there is always more than meets the eye will allow us to practice patience and extend grace in situations that on the surface seem to be wholly negative. The old man who’s been driving painfully slow hasn’t heard from his daughter in ten years. The punk kid with the loud music has been told repeatedly that he’s worthless. The homeless lady is a victim of human trafficking and the only way she knows how to survive without turning tricks is to beg for money.

Christians believe that our journey here on earth is to prepare us for eternity with God. So if that is the case, then how does patience cultivated here relate to heaven, where we will have perfect conditions and an endless amount of time? Besides the fact that the Bible commands us to develop patience, I think it has everything to do with taking the time to see the truth in order that we may extend the compassion of Jesus. Being patient with those who need mercy (and we all do!) will help them see the truth of a loving God in our actions. By accepting God’s invitation nestled within every challenging moment, we are living out 1 Thessalonians 5:14 which encourages us to be patient with everyone — not just those who deserve it.

Practicing patience isn’t only good for those we encounter, it’s also good for us. Sitting in front of artwork for three hours is difficult, but paintings are inanimate objects. They don’t have audible voices like screaming children. They don’t have the ability to move like an angry driver cutting you off. They don’t have selfish desires like a co-worker who steals the credit for your job well done. Enduring three hours in a meeting with an irritating person requires an entirely different level of endurance, especially when it is so easy to be blinded by their actions and attitudes. And this is why developing patience and learning to extend compassion is good for us — because we must rely on the strength, wisdom and love of Christ working through us to do so. Loving difficult people and enduring frustrating situations with grace teaches our spirits to abide with Jesus more and more each day. Colossians 1:10b -12 says, “All the while, you will grow as you learn to know God better and better. We also pray that you will be strengthened with all His glorious power so you will have all the endurance and patience you need. May you be filled with joy, always thanking the Father. He has enabled you to share in the inheritance that belongs to His people, who live in the light.”

Jesus saw through the exterior demeanor and behaviors of frustrating people and instead looked into their hearts. He saw the truth of difficult situations and knew what the final outcomes would be. What Jesus was able to see immediately, it may take us hours, days, or even years to see. But no matter how long it takes, we’ll never see any of it if we don’t believe He has a plan for all of it in the first place. Impatience is a blinding weakness that relies on external circumstances to make us feel content, happy, or calm. Patience is yielding that weakness to the power of Christ and allowing Him to make us content, joyful and calm by being vessels for His glory, instruments of His love, and pictures of His gentle peace. 
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On Monday this week, I took what might be my last jump in the lake for the summer. We had a rare streak of hot days this September and when I looked at the 10-day forecast, it became clear that Maine has probably had its last day of true summer heat for the year. My late afternoon dip was ceremonial in a sense… an ode to an amazing summer filled with laughter, campfires, outdoor living, a house full of guests, and way too many s’mores. Because I live in place that in the winter gets more than its fair share of blizzards and six-foot snow drifts, summer is both magical and elusive in its nature, which makes me want to take in every ray of warm sunshine. Like a big, wet beach towel, it’s as though I spend most of September trying to wring out every last drop of the golden hours.

As the ideal weather for warm, lazy moments in the hammock is slowly morphing into crisp, cool air just perfect for apple picking and Sunday afternoon football, I have a choice to face reality or ignore it. Like anything in life, the season is changing to push me out of familiarity and into new priorities. There are moments where I want to resist this natural course. When I’ve wrung out all I can of the season, I am tempted to begin reliving the immediate past instead of looking forward to the slate of fresh, new opportunities before me. Because I’ve become accustomed to warm-weather in the last four months, certain habits, like wearing flip-flops everywhere, are now entrenched. And as we all know, entrenched things don’t lend themselves to being dug up easily. It is so much easier to burrow down, on all fronts — physical, mental, and emotional — and try to maintain the status quo.

When I was younger I used to hate the expression, “All good things must come to an end.” I viewed it as 100% negative and promised myself to never use it in everyday conversation. When I looked up the origin of the saying, it confirms the negative implications. Geoffrey Chaucer is credited with coining the phrase way back in the 1300s. He used it to describe the end of a beautiful relationship. Ever since then, the world has been using it to communicate resignation or acceptance of something going from good to bad, or to signify the ending of something wonderful that can never be again.

Thankfully, my perception of this timeless truth has gradually changed. It took a long time for me to realize that my negative reaction to this saying was rooted in immaturity and selfishness. I previously equated the saying with the other all-too-common refrain of, “That’s not fair!” In other words, we want what we want, when we want it, and we don’t think we should ever have to give up anything unless we choose to do so. (Bonus points if you repeat that last line to yourself out loud while whining like a five-year-old.) But the reality is that God designed our lives and our journeys for change… for progression … for growth.

All change is uncomfortable on some level, even the small stuff. We don’t always recognize it, thank goodness. But when we do acknowledge it, our culture and natural instincts tell us to whine about it. View it as negative. View it as something being taken away from us. Whether it’s a material possession like wrecking your new car or something far more precious like the loss of a loved one, the seasons that come and go in life are always challenging us… our resiliency, our attitudes, our openness, and most importantly our faith. Every moment of change is an opportunity to welcome God’s plan for our lives, which is not headed toward a cruel, impersonal end, but rather something positive and specifically designed for each of us as individuals.  And our belief — or not — in that truth makes all the difference between welcoming the next season or resisting it and letting what is absent turn into a knotty, twisted root of resentfulness or bitterness in our hearts. The condition of our heart is mirrored in our eyes, which in turn colors how we see and process everything.

Instead, the Word of God shows us how to walk in trust and maturity toward growth, rather than dwelling in the past with our fists clenched so tight that we are no longer holding anything of value. When we truly believe to the point of action, we can literally experience the presence of Jesus as He bends down to touch our sweaty, tight fists, look into our eyes, and whisper, “It’s time to open those, dear one. Give me all that you have, you can trust me with your heart, your needs, and your life. When you receive the changes I am bringing, you will find fulfillment for the true desires of your heart and the greatest longings in your soul.”

For many years, I thought I believed. And I did to a certain point. I experienced God moving in my life, but each time I entered a certain kind of season that was particularly challenging for me, my belief was tested and I would crumble and run to my corner with my fists up. Seasons that test me, may not challenge you. We’re all different. What drives us to the corner is different. But Jesus comes to any corner, in any season, and He will keep asking you to open your fists. Put your dukes down. Stop trying to control everything. Stop saying, “It’s not fair.” We may go through three of the same season, 10 seasons, or more, before we finally look up and believe enough to open our hands.

A woman who had her fists clenched is portrayed in the Gospel of John 8:1-11. She was in a terrible season. We know she committed a sin, but we have no idea about the kind of life she had been living or how far she had been pushed into desperation. Regardless of the road she took to get there, she ended up in a heap in the dirt with big stones scattered all around her. After rescuing her from certain death, Jesus got down in the dirt and filth with her to open her hands and her heart to do things differently from now on. He didn’t reveal to her a step-by-step how-to guide, but He entreated her to follow Him and trust.
Jesus was good at unclenching fists of all kinds. Some belonged to people desperate for change and others were the hands of people who had previously refused to welcome any kind of change. The greatest common denominator of them all? Belief. Belief brings conviction, which in turn, births humility, followed by love. Fast on the heels of love comes service. When you love someone, you take action for them, even at your own discomfort or expense. But it all starts with belief.

Each of the disciples struggled with belief on some level, and they had Jesus right in front of them. We’re all quick to disparage Thomas because he refused to believe that Jesus had risen from the dead until he saw Him face to face. But would you or I have done any better? Can’t you just see Thomas, or yourself, standing in the corner of the Upper Room where all the disciples were huddled in fear waiting on the Romans to take them to jail? I bet his arms were crossed and his fists were clenched. The new season had come and he hated it. He was unsure. It wasn’t fair that Jesus had been killed. Then his perspective changed in an instant. In John 20:24-29, we read this: “A week later His disciples were in the house again, and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, ‘Peace be with you!’ Then He said to Thomas, ‘Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe’.” Repeat that last sentence to yourself. Stop doubting and believe. It’s a command and a blessing all at once. I think in that moment, Jesus opened Thomas’ hands, mind, and heart to the next season.

The passage continues, “Thomas said to him, ‘My Lord and my God!’ Then Jesus told him, ‘Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed’.” You may believe that the disciples had some advantage that you or I don’t, but Jesus assures us that we will be blessed in a way the disciples were not if we believe in what we can’t always see, feel, or hear. We can’t see the future or know what each season holds, but we are called to believe Romans 8:28 when it says that He will use any season for our good and His glory. Hebrews 12:11 promises a peaceful harvest of right living for those who receive and grow in seasons of discipline.

We also have no reason, no matter how much our brains tell us otherwise, to view a change with the assumption that it will bring something we don’t like or that life will be worse than before it came. Nor should we believe the lie that the season of life coming to an end was so good that nothing else will ever again come close to it. That sense of losing out may define what it means to be human, but Jesus came as proof to show us that there is so much more than we can know, fathom, or understand with our limited capabilities here on earth. Romans 8:6 says, “So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace.”

As we say goodbye to the summer of 2018, let it be a reminder to you of the good that’s yet to come. No matter what’s in store for your life, the country, the culture, or the world, we can count on a God who loves us more than we can even think or imagine. If you need assurance of that, I encourage you to read Ephesians 3:14-19. And when you do, I encourage you to read it out loud. Stare down your doubts and fears and resolutely proclaim it as often as necessary. Memorize it. And then rest in knowing that it’s a promise that the Holy Spirit will tailor just for you and your season at hand.
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When we were kids, time just seemed to crawl. Remember how long an afternoon felt when there was nothing to do? Did you drive your parents crazy by constantly fidgeting when waiting in lengthy lines? And, of course, there was always the proverbial long car ride peppered by the constant question from the backseat: “Are we there yet?”

If you’re like me, then you would love to once again experience the sensation of time crawling because as we age, it just seems to fly by at a faster and faster clip each year. Nor, do we ever seem to have enough of it. Well, as far as I know, there’s only one guaranteed way for adults to dramatically slow down the clock and momentarily return to a perception that time is dragging. Unfortunately, however, it is almost sure to be an unpleasant experience. Having to wait on something really important, big, or life-changing to happen will turn minutes into hours, days into weeks, and months into years. It’s incredible, really. Whether it’s waiting to be able to afford a better house, waiting on test results (of any kind!), waiting for a long overdue promotion, waiting to become pregnant, or waiting on the opportunity to pursue a lifelong dream, the list of things that can make waiting seem like an eternity is as long and varied as each individual.

But how do we learn to wait well? What does God want us to do and how does He want us to handle these periods of waiting? And as long as we’re asking the hard questions, then why does He make us wait?

The right answer certainly isn’t coming from today’s mainstream culture, which revolves around instant gratification and constant self-indulgence. Furthermore, any period of waiting is perceived as wasted, holding no value whatsoever. But the great news is this pessimistic, sad portrayal of waiting is exactly the opposite of what God intends for those who choose to trust in Him. The day-to-day times of waiting in our lives are real opportunities for divine training to draw us closer to God and proclaim that every second counts — every second matters — to the King of universe. When we shift our perspective from waiting as an arduous, painful time-waster to time well spent being spiritually productive, then we’ve already won half the battle. Whether it’s a five-minute wait in traffic or a fifteen-year wait for the love of your life, the Holy Spirit will redeem the time spent if we have the right perspective and a teachable heart.

Scripture gives us a seven-part prescription for waiting and included in this divine remedy we also find the reasons why He sometimes makes us wait in the first place. Each of these reasons transforms into spiritual gifts that can only be bestowed upon us if we make it through the waiting process God’s way and not by our own methods, force, or manipulation.

1. Welcome the waiting. The remainder of this prescription won’t work if we don’t begin by going beyond acceptance of our situation to fully embracing the waiting… however long it might be. When we fight the inevitable, we limit our vision, generate bitterness, and close any doors to spiritual growth. Sure, God can handle us asking Him, “why?” But whether He answers us immediately or not, we must welcome the waiting with open arms. After all, sometimes the answers to the question why become crystal clear during the process. If you believe in God, then you must have faith that He has a purpose in the waiting and then make your heart ready to receive it. Psalm 27:14 says, “Wait for the Lord, be strong and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord.” James 1:2-3 encourages fullness of joy in everything, not resignation. Gifts: trust, hope, courage 
2. Evict the anxiety. Kick it right out of your mind and instead fill it up with prayer, scripture meditation, and praise. Many of us were raised to believe that we need to worry or fear during times of uncertainty, but God wants you to trust Him to the point that you can be still, peaceful and joyful in the waiting. If God is allowing the waiting, then He has a plan for it to end as well. Remember, He holds whatever you’re waiting for in the palm of His hand and He’s preparing you for it. If you busy your mind with prayer, scripture, and praise, it won’t have time to fret during the waiting. Philippians 4:6 says, “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” 1 John 4:16-18 tells us that a well-developed love for God squeezes out any room for fear. Set your sites on loving God instead of thinking about the waiting. Gifts: peace, contentment, rest 
3. Stop looking for shortcuts. Release your need for control of the situation and stop trying to circumvent the process. Yes, God wants you to use your brain to be creative, resourceful, and efficient, but He doesn’t want you to spend countless hours over-researching, over-analyzing, and brainstorming ways to end the waiting prematurely. God has great plans for us at the end of the process, but we all too often miss out on the blessing because we took a shortcut or sought out a substitute for the real thing. If you’re willing to surrender control to the Holy Spirit, He will let you know when your “brain work” has moved passed the healthy mark and into obsessive control and impatience. In Matthew 11:29 Jesus encourages us to work out life His way. This often precludes shortcuts, but promises grace and strength in the journey. “Walk with me and work with me — watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” Gifts: patience, self-control, strength 
4. Give thanks continually. One of the greatest temptations while waiting is succumbing to a bad attitude, tinged with bitterness, self-pity, and brimming with negativity. At the root of these dangerous feelings is pride, which tells us that we deserve better and we should have it right now. Instead, we are called to humble ourselves before God and thank Him for His goodness. When we sincerely and unceasingly praise God and thank Him for everything — not just the good stuff — something downright magical happens in our souls, transforming our perspectives and generating overflowing joy. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says, “Be cheerful no matter what; pray all the time; thank God no matter what happens. This is the way God wants you who belong to Christ Jesus to live.” Gifts: joy, humility
5. Play your position in the meantime. Just because we’re waiting, doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be productive. Whatever place we’re at in life, God expects us to play that position to its fullest. We are to continue working, serving, and loving in every moment at a quality level that is worthy of our King. Being stagnant leads to boredom and opens the door for negative thoughts, endless self-analysis, circular reasoning, and temptations. All too often, we use the excuse of waiting on God as a reason to not get involved in serving others or excelling in our current roles. Colossians 3:23-24 reminds us to work for the Lord, not for reward or the approval of others. Psalm 130:5 says, “I am counting on the Lord; yes, I am counting on Him. I have put my hope in His word.” Gifts: maturity, endurance, compassion 
6. Expect great things. God never brings us second best when we wait on Him the right way. I shudder to think how many times I have settled for a substitute or rushed my way to something that is second best, rather than holding out for God to deliver the right thing for me and for His glory. When we wait on God with patience and great expectation, He will be glorified and we will be truly satisfied. Psalm 25:3a says “Indeed, none who wait for You shall be put to shame…” Gifts: faith, vision, dependence
7. Prepare for God’s best. If God is bringing us His best, then we should strive to offer Him our best in return. There is nothing we can wait for that can’t be enhanced by some kind of preparedness, whether it be spiritual, physical, or emotional in nature. In advance of whatever is coming, we have the opportunity to prayerfully examine ourselves and look for areas in need of improvement. Whatever you’re waiting on God to do, chances are there is something He wants you to work on in the interim with greater consistency. Perhaps it’s reading the Word, getting healthy, tithing, getting out of debt, learning a new skill, giving up something… it could be anything that will make whatever you’re waiting on even more amazing. In Luke 16:10 Jesus says that if we’re faithful in the little things, God will entrust us with bigger things. Gifts: discipline, consistency, tenacity

​Lewis Smedes wrote, “Waiting is the hardest work of hope.” And none of us like to do it. But keeping our focus on God, instead of whatever it is that we’re waiting for, is the ultimate key to waiting with grace. In His faithful hands, we can trust that our Father will use the waiting to reveal more about Himself and shape us into being more like Jesus in the process. James 1:4 encourages us with these words, “And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” Scripture encourages us to let waiting fulfill its God-directed purpose in our lives, as each moment of being in between the now and the not yet, or in between the desire and the deliverance, can draw us closer to the One who loves us completely in every second.
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Like a catchy song, sometimes I come across a quote that won’t stop resounding in my heart and circling in my mind. I usually end up posting it near my computer or by my bed, reading it over and over to savor the layers and depths of it, knowing that it has found its mark in my soul either because I feel convicted, encouraged, or both.

One such quote by Jonathan Edwards (circa 1773) has been swirling in my mind for months now. “God is the highest good of the reasonable creature, and the enjoyment of Him is the only happiness with which our souls can be satisfied. To go to heaven fully to enjoy God is infinitely better than the most pleasant accommodations here. Fathers and mothers, husbands, wives, children, or the company of earthly friends, are but shadows. But the enjoyment of God is the substance. These are but scattered beams, but God is the sun. These are but streams, but God is the fountain. These are but drops, but God is the ocean.”

While I know in my heart what we experience here on earth — in even our happiest and most sublime moments — is just a paltry fraction of what’s to come in eternity, getting that truth to permeate my mind to the point where my thought patterns, behaviors, and priorities are actually impacted seems next to impossible. Despite my passionate pursuit to know and love God, my attention to, or my understanding of, the impact of heaven’s reality on my daily life, is almost missing entirely. And that problem is not unusual for most Christians. Topics on coping with the trials of life often include a million how-to’s, life hacks, tips and tricks, but the discipline and practical application of being heaven-minded is rarely mentioned or explained. Even the curriculum taught at many Christian colleges and seminaries contains relatively slim components about heaven and eternity, so it’s no wonder that collectively — as the body of Christ — we don’t talk about it enough. Therefore, we don’t even know what we’re missing.

End times prophecy is always a popular discussion in Christian circles and it usually generates high attendance for a Bible study, but it is not the same topic as a focus on heaven itself. Ideas surrounding the rapture, the tribulation, and their timing, often overshadow the real endgame of the Biblical story, which is much more revolutionary and life-changing than we can possibly imagine. Heaven is the culmination of the entire Biblical story. Jesus sacrificed His life so that He could bring us into eternal fellowship with Him, in a place that He has personally and beautifully prepared just for us. Exquisitely tailored to each individual’s uniqueness, we will commune forever in perfect harmony in a place that pulses with the heartbeat of God Himself. So if life on earth is all about preparing for eternity with Jesus, then why aren’t we more impacted by the reality of our future home?

The theologians of old, like Jonathan Edwards, and their congregations had a far better grasp on the current impact of our heavenly destiny than our culture does today. Perhaps it’s because they lived under much harsher conditions. The average lifespan of an American in the late 18th century was just 36 years old. And in 17th century New England, about 40% of the population died before reaching adulthood. In many communities, churches ceased to ring bells when someone passed away because the noise level and frequency had become such a nuisance. There is no question that daily life in the colonial period was far more precarious than any of us in modern times can even fathom.

So perhaps it was the close proximity and constant reminder of death that pushed our Christian ancestors to study the truth of heaven and keep its reality at the forefront of their minds. They had no choice, really. By studying and applying the concept of heaven on a daily basis, they found a pathway to comfort, peace, joy, and hope in the midst of extreme hardship. In today’s society, however, even with all of our healthcare, conveniences, technology, gourmet food, and gadgets, most people go through their days frazzled, stressed, anxious, and angry. According to scholars, our society is dramatically more fragmented and interpersonally disconnected than the typical life of an early American colonist. Prior to the early 1900s, most of human history was marked by the need for community. Residents of towns and villages had no choice but to collaborate and communicate frequently in person — not via a digital social network or a mass broadcast — in order to survive. God designed us to function best in community serving and loving each other… but that’s a blog topic for another day.

Of course, I am as grateful as the next person that every day is not a test of my survival and I don’t have to ration out lumps of dirty coal in the wintertime to stay warm. But in all my luxury, I think I’m as guilty as the next person about understanding the mind-blowing ramifications of the heaven Jesus gave His life to provide. C.S. Lewis said, “Our whole education tends to fix our minds on this world. . . When the real want for Heaven is present in us, we do not recognize it. Most people, if they had really learned to look into their own hearts, would know that they do want, and want acutely, something that cannot be had in this world. There are all sorts of things in this world that offer to give it to you, but they never quite keep their promise. . .  If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.”

Humans are simply wired to hope. We were created in the image of God and there’s something deep inside of us that subconsciously remembers the splendor for which we were originally intended. That’s why anticipation can change everything… our perspective, moods, and even our endurance levels. Why else would we spend weeks, and sometimes months, daydreaming about our next big vacation or special event? That’s because a substantial portion of the happiness generated by any “big” life moment is wrapped up in the anticipation of its coming. Knowing that we will be lying on a beach somewhere in a few weeks, can give us the strength to shovel out another snowstorm. Thinking about the joy of Christmas morning can put a smile on our faces and patience in our hearts while we wait in a long line on Black Friday. And so it should be with the anticipation of heaven. Why do we spend weeks, if not months, planning for a special getaway, but don’t spend a fraction of that time studying the eternal home that awaits us?

Heaven puts suffering into perspective and gives us both a vision and a real sensation of relief. Romans 8:18 and 28 (AMP) says, “For I consider [from the standpoint of faith] that the sufferings of the present life are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is about to be revealed to us and in us! And we know [with great confidence] that God [who is deeply concerned about us] causes all things to work together [as a plan] for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to His plan and purpose.” It’s not that what we go through here is small, but rather that the weight of the glory mentioned in 2 Corinthians 4:17 is that huge. The scale of heaven’s pleasure is so vast, even our worst suffering will someday seem insignificant.

So to get you started, here are 10 dazzling, exciting and comforting things to heartily anticipate about heaven. God commands us to take pleasure in Him (Psalm 37:4), not just in our future eternity, but right now. Therefore, daydreaming about what Jesus has personally prepared for us is not only Biblical (2 Peter 3:13), it is one of the best mood-lifters and perspective-shifters humankind has ever known.

1. We will have perfect bodies and will never face a physical death again. (1 Corinthians 15:51–52)
2. We will be uniquely us and not some amorphous hazy being. Nor will we be like the angels. We will be who we were created to be and not exactly like anyone else. (Philippians 3:20-21; Matthew 8:11)
3. We will eat and drink luxuriously at the finest banquets. (Isaiah 25:6, Luke 13:29)
4. We will know and continue to have relationships with our loved ones. (Genesis 25:8)
5. We will never be bored and will have meaningful work to do that we absolutely love, just as God originally intended in the Garden of Eden. (Genesis 2:15; Revelation 7:15, 2 Timothy 2:12)
6. We will never have pain, negative emotions, or hurt feelings. (Revelation 21:4)
7. We will experience a new heaven AND a new earth. (Revelation 21:1-2; Ezekiel 36:35)
8. We will physically enjoy a perfect “great outdoors” and be enveloped in visual beauty and splendor. (Isaiah 51:3, 2 Peter 3:12-13)
9. We will live in tranquility, joy, and complete satisfaction. We will never long for anything or crave something in excess. Finally, we will live in perfect balance. (Psalm 16:11)
10. We will see, converse with, and touch Jesus Himself. (Psalm 11:7, John 14:3)

The last thing a believer should do is wait until death is knowingly looming on the horizon to ponder life in “another world,” as C.S. Lewis called it. Although none of us know how much time we have left, the practice of imagining the pleasures of heaven now makes the road between here and there much more bearable. It also enables the final passage to be less about fear and more about anticipation. If you want to dive deeper into the topic of heaven, one of the foremost authorities on the subject is Randy Alcorn. I encourage you to read more, do an in-depth Bible study, like this one, or check out a daily devotional about the glorious eternal home that awaits us. And if you really want to geek out like me, check out this video of Randy’s appearance at the Desiring God Conference in 2013. The title of his talk is C.S. Lewis on Heaven and the New Earth: God’s Eternal Remedy to the Problem of Evil and Suffering. After digesting that meaty morsel of theological goodness, you won’t be able to resist thinking about the majestic, incomprehensibly wonderful life that awaits us.
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For almost six weeks this summer, my house was like a B&B with a string of out of town guests. Believe it or not, I had a great time playing hostess, baking early morning wild blueberry scones, making sure that each visitor had all the essentials, and checking the weather for any impact on our plans. Now, I don’t really consider myself overly gifted in the hospitality department, but I have to admit that my inner Martha Stewart emerged just a tiny bit, minus the over-the-top decorations and crafting projects. At the end of each day, I wanted to go to bed knowing that they had a good time, ate some amazing food, and felt comfortable enough to truly relax.

Despite this, after about the third week of welcoming family and friends, I was surprised to find myself struggling emotionally without the familiar comfort of some of my usual habits. In order to accommodate the desires and schedules of a houseful of vacationers, there were some routines I just had to temporarily give up. A few of my emotions were far stronger than I would have anticipated, and this realization made me stop and ask myself if I was just becoming too set in my ways (i.e. old!) to be flexible or if the power of my repetitive behaviors was far greater than I realized.

Then I recalled a quote from a research-driven book that I read a few years ago called The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg: “(Habits) shape our lives far more than we realize — they are so strong, in fact, that they cause our brains to cling to them at the exclusion of all else, including common sense.” Phew! It’s not necessarily that I am getting old. I felt immediately better. But now I still had to figure out what to do about the emotions I was wrestling with since my life wouldn’t return to normal for several more weeks and, above all, I wanted to make everyone feel comfortable. I mean, who would want to come back to a cranky person’s house for vacation?

As I pondered this, I came to realize how many of the habits I was missing at the moment had a direct connection to my sense of place… my home. When I’ve gone away on vacation, it’s always been easier to forgo some of my routines because I am simply not in the usual place where they occur. This fact is actually a detriment to some of my good habits that also go out the window when I’m traveling, like eating right. Sigh. But being out of routine in the place where you dwell is naturally unsettling and both our bodies and minds immediately experience dissonance when a familiar environment becomes inhospitable to our habits. This is exactly why changing our bad habits is so hard in the first place. We are conditioned to them and our minds and bodies naturally return to them, especially in times of weakness, stress or sadness. According to Duhigg, “Habits, scientists say, emerge because the brain is constantly looking for ways to save effort. Left to its own devices, the brain will try to make almost any routine into a habit, because habits allow our minds to ramp down more often.”

Hebrews 12 is one of my favorite scripture passages about the importance of keeping good habits and working to change the bad ones. In verse 11, we find incredible encouragement: “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” Being watchful of our habits and making tough changes to our routines can only be done through continuous training. I placed this verse on my wall above my computer last year following a major career shift in my life. After 25 years of ingrained work patterns, disciplines, and routines, my productivity was virtually paralyzed without familiar surroundings, expectations, people, or schedules. Knowing that Jesus was working to bring about “a peaceful harvest of right living” inside of me, as the New Living Translation phrases it, sustained me through months and months of feeling like a fish out of water even though I was sitting in my own home office.

Paul goes on to say in verse 12: “Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed.” The Holy Spirit is with us to lift us up, empower us, and give us the endurance to make hard changes and then stick with healthy habits of all kinds, no matter whether they are spiritual, physical, or relational in nature. Paul had firsthand experience with replacing bad habits with new ones. Imagine the changes that he had to make when he abandoned his life as a Jewish persecutor of Christians and became a Christ-follower himself. Every habit, schedule, expectation and routine he possessed needed to change. And when you’re facing a mountain of changes all at once, there’s nothing Satan wants to achieve more than to bring you down and make you feel weak in the knees. That’s when we lift our tired and weary hands regardless of our emotions and sing praises to the One who will always lift our heart and our hands. Psalm 64:10 says to make praise your habit because God is always at work, and Psalm 3:3 says He is the lifter of our heads.

We are promised success when we honor God with our lives as living sacrifices, which is the same thing as turning our daily habits, goals, resources, and time over to Him to direct and manage for His purposes. 1 Timothy 1:7 says, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” As believers, we have the power inside of us to change any habit and cultivate lives that point to Jesus. I am reminded of this everyday before I exercise. I don’t want to exercise. As a matter of fact, I dread it. Daily. But there’s no room for laziness when committing to a good, but a difficult habit to maintain. If I let just one day go, with the exception of simply being unable to exercise due to something like illness, then I suddenly find that it’s even easier to let the second day slide, and the third day after that… and before I know it, I’ve fallen off the fitness wagon and onto my couch… with a bag of chips. And maybe some Ben & Jerry’s. Not good. Mental habits are no exception to laziness either. As a continually recovering worrier, I must exercise the muscles of my mind every day to avoid sliding into anxiety or negative thoughts. Yes, there are days I fail at exercise and at cultivating a peaceful heart, but deep diving into scripture meditation and prayer are good habits that also act as guardrails to keep me from completely sliding off the cliffs of laziness, complacency, and discouragement.

So I bet you’re still wondering how I avoided turning into Oscar the Grouch with my guests. Well, like any would-be novelist with a strong imagination, I simply pretended. For the last few weeks, at least in my mind, we were all on vacation together at a rental house that I picked out with our specific guests in mind. I still felt somewhat responsible to entertain and accommodate, but I suddenly wanted to do all the things I loved on vacation too, like getting lost in a really good summer novel. I ended up being more relaxed and less bothered by my missing routines.

Now I sit here writing this in an empty house, with one of my favorite afternoon habits — a cup of hot green cinnamon tea. The instrumental music is playing to help me write… everything is quiet and everyone is gone. Back to their jobs, schools, homes… and their own habits and routines. And I am back to mine. Only this time, I have determined to set fresh eyes on my habits with renewed inspiration to make some adjustments. One of my favorite quotes is from David Mathis who wrote Habits of Grace, “Your habits are, in fact, one of the most important things about you. Those repeated actions you take over and over, almost mindlessly, reveal your true self over time as much as anything else.” Being reminded of how powerful my habits are and how important God’s calling should be in my life, has made me realize the very things I don’t usually think about are some of the most critical things to actually spend time thinking about. Taming our habits is certainly not easy, but yielding to the Holy Spirit to help us do it gives us a power that’s even greater than the force of the habits themselves.

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The time we have on earth is a lot like living in a big backyard surrounded by an unscalable wooden fence. As believers, we know that an eternal life waits for us on the other side, light years better than anything we can see or understand from our vantage point here in the backyard. But because we can’t see through the fence, we depend on faith to assure us that there is indeed much more in store for us than the routines, struggles and earthly pleasures of our everyday lives. 

Every now and then, however, we are blessed to come upon a knothole in the fence. It might be something someone says at the perfect moment, a fleeting sense of wonder, or even a momentary vision, but these often unexpected knotholes give us tiny, yet enlightening, glimpses into God’s miraculous work behind the scenes on our behalf. Sometimes we find them right after a difficult trial when our eyes are suddenly opened to see why God allowed certain events to occur. Other times, a glimpse happens right out of the blue through the power of a scripture passage, a timely word from a friend, or a moment of worship. Like precious evidence in a scientific investigation, these small insights build our faith over time and encourage us to keep going through the toughest of seasons.

Prayerful stillness is one of the best ways to find knotholes, especially if you find yourself sitting in the backyard staring in frustration at the fence line, instead of flourishing where God’s placed you. We’ve all been there… frustrated, discouraged, or maybe even feeling betrayed. We believe God must be working, but we’re tired of only looking at that big, stationary fence. We long for movement, change, improvement… anything, really. And if we’re not careful, our longings will eventually eclipse our desire for God Himself, and then we risk camping out at the fence line forever. And this is where prayer comes in — not with a goal of finding the knotholes, but with an aim of knowing and depending on our Heavenly Father more and more whether we can see what’s on the other side or not. 

We can spend hours, days, weeks and even years asking why, when all God wants us to do is be still before Him, humbly listen, and then obey. Even when we take the time out from our jobs, commitments, and chores, we often remain busy in our minds. The to-do lists, over analysis, and worries, spin in our head, drowning out any chance of hearing His voice, feeling His comfort, or seeing His hand move. Prayer, scripture meditation, and solitude in God’s presence are the antidotes to an obsession with staring at the fence line and asking why over and over. God can reveal deep things in our prayerful stillness that we simply cannot perceive, or receive, when we’re busy with life’s demands or consumed with worry. 

Stillness is hard. Solitude is practically a lost art. And if you’re an extrovert, like me, these spiritual disciplines are even more difficult to cultivate. But the “whys” of life will never stop. As soon as one unknown is revealed, another one will always pop up. The Enemy of our souls knows this and uses the crazy busyness of our lives and our minds to make sure we never find peace in the storms of fear, doubt, and unanswered questions that flood our backyards. But Jesus says, “Peace, be still” to our hearts, minds, and souls. In fact, peace is mentioned more than 400 times in the Bible, and Jesus talked about it repeatedly with the disciples. He knew that our tendency toward busyness would choke the life out of our spiritual health, so He modeled the practice of stillness and solitude (Luke 6:12, Matthew 14:13). Jesus wanted to make sure the disciples understood that nurturing a deep intimacy with God the Father, was foundational to the abundant life He promised them. Repeatedly, He left the busyness of ministry and the demands of His closest companions to be alone with God.

It took me many years to realize that the reason I couldn’t see many of God’s divine knotholes was that I was focusing on the storms themselves instead of keeping my eyes on Jesus, despite the unsettling circumstances swirling around me. I used to expect Him to make everything go away, rather than holding my hand through the struggles and unmet expectations. I used to keep myself so busy I could ignore the storms on the horizon, rather than being still with Jesus and letting him teach me, prepare me, and then lead me through them. Every time a new trial comes, I struggle to keep from reverting back to my old habits, but God has always been faithful to make me stronger when I trust Him.

In the gospel of Mark, we see Jesus’ habit of quiet time with God at the very beginning of His ministry. “And rising very early in the morning, while it was still dark, He departed and went out to a desolate place, and there He prayed. And Simon and those who were with Him searched for Him, and they found Him and said to Him, ‘Everyone is looking for you’.” (Mark 1:35-37) Notice that Jesus went far enough away from them to truly get alone with His Father. Also, He didn’t give in to the mental busyness associated with His work or relationships. We often forgo quiet time with God when the expectations of people around us are particularly pressing or close-by. Jesus’ example in this passage especially spoke to me, as I have had a series of summer house guests for more than a month. While I tried to carve out the time and a place to be alone with God daily, it didn’t always happen. But on the days it did, I had abundantly more grace, joy, generosity, and love for those staying in my home. And exhibiting the love of Jesus to my guests was far more important than how much lobster they ate, swimming they enjoyed, or the wildlife they observed.

Jesus, of course, didn’t need knotholes in the fence of earthly life to know what His Father was up to. We read in John 5:19, “So Jesus said to them, ‘Truly, truly, I say to you, the Son can do nothing of His own accord, but only what He sees the Father doing. For whatever the Father does, the Son does likewise’.” So if Jesus Himself needed solitude with His Father, then how much more so do you and I need it to get through the days, months and years? As Jesus was one with the Father, His sacrifice ensured that we could also be one with God through the gift of the Holy Spirit (John 14:26, 16:7). When we’re open to the movement of the Holy Spirit, we just never know when He’ll stir our hearts and awaken some new, previously unknown corner of our spirits. Whether clear and strong or muted and gentle, the Spirit moves to help us grasp or experience His truth, direction, and presence in life-altering ways. No matter how the knothole appears or what form it takes, it will most often come in a moment of stillness. The Psalmist said, “Be still and know that I am God,” (46:10), and Isaiah urged, “In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength. (30:15)”

The backyard of your life might be a thriving pleasant landscape, or it may be undergoing a major renovation. It might be a place filled with weeds or as barren as a desert plain. But no matter what its condition, God planted you there or is allowing you to linger there for a reason. You may not see any knotholes in the fence and even feel like the boundaries are getting smaller, but He longs to create an oasis for you right in the middle of it all. Through intimate moments alone with Him, your heart can overflow with gratitude, sink into deep peace, and laugh with joy, whether you’re enjoying a season of plenty or climbing a mountain of hardship. The backyard of life can only have one Master Gardener, but we have to let Him come inside to do His work on a regular basis.

Questions for Reflection and Spiritual Journaling

• Read Psalm 46 and Mark 1:35-37. Spend some time praying and asking the Lord to reveal Himself to you. Write down what the Holy Spirit whispers to you.
• How often do you practice complete stillness before the Lord? How do you think you could work more of this practice into your lifestyle?
• Reflect on a time when God revealed something to you in prayer or meditation. How did you know it was from God? How do the habits of Jesus encourage you to spend more time alone with our Heavenly Father?
• One of the most powerful ways to spend time with Jesus is to imagine yourself in His presence. Take some time to envision yourself having a conversation with the risen King. What would you say to each other? What kind of setting is most appealing to you and why?

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Ahhhh, summertime. As kids, it was the season we lived for all year long. It was a chance to get out of the routine of studying, homework, and packed schedules. And although it flew by, we learned to relish every moment of swimming, ice cream cones, sleeping in, and going on the family vacation or camping trip.  ​

And then… we grew up.

In America, that means we suffered through the reality shock that most jobs don’t offer the summer off. Eventually as college finished and we started job hunting, we also woke up to the more subtle but more shocking fact that in order to be admired by our peers and to build a desirable workplace reputation, we must be as productive and dedicated as humanly possible. Oh, and then we found out that this standard didn’t just apply to our jobs. No, to be truly admired, we needed to be well-rounded and interesting. So in addition to insane work hours, we threw in a hefty dose of cultural and social activities, a fitness regime, plus a measurable splash of volunteerism or activism. 

Last time someone asked you how you’re doing, do you remember your reply? Chances are, your response included some reference to being busy. According to multiple studies highlighted in the Harvard Business Review, the vast majority of Americans now view busyness as a status symbol. In other words, the busier you seem, the more likely people will respect you and think that you’re prosperous, highly valued, and hard working. The researchers saw evidence of this perception in social media, interpersonal communications, advertising messaging, and hiring trends. By stark contrast, a century ago, the ability to enjoy free time and leisure activities was universally perceived by most Americans to be a blessing and a sign of success in life. And we are predominantly unique in our obsession with busyness. Studies conducted among Europeans, for example, show that they largely perceive that a more relaxed lifestyle is still a sign of success. 

Researchers speculate that this dramatic shift in American culture is partially due the rise of the knowledge economy, particularly fueled by our insatiable appetite for technology. We practically sleep with our smartphones, which means texting, calendar reminders, to do lists, social media interactions, and a host of other time-intensive demands are constantly vying for our attention. Studies on this topic, repeatedly indicate that as a society, we are multi-tasking more and quite literally reshaping our brains to be less inclined toward reflection, meditation, long-form reading/studying, and deep conversations. 

Unfortunately, the cultural value for busyness has also infiltrated and tainted the spiritual outlook of many believers to the point where all margin for rest has been entirely squeezed out of our lives. Some of us volunteer to serve until we teeter on burn out. Others of us justify crazy schedules and overindulgences all week long by not working on Sundays. But overall, most of us aren’t doing much better with finding time for rest than people who don’t profess a belief in God. 

Four Keys to Getting out of the Busyness Habit
So how do we get out of this busy rut? How do we become counter-cultural when every voice and influence around us is saturating us with seemingly important requirements and demands? Do we have the courage to let God take care of how we’re perceived by others, rather than building up our image by appearing to be busy, needed and validated? Four key things really stick out to me when reading the Word or doing a study about God’s design for rest.

1. Understand the broader meaning of the Sabbath principle. God’s design for rest is much bigger than not working on Sundays. In her study, Breathe: Making Room For Sabbath, Priscilla Shirer says, “God always and eternally intended the Sabbath to be a lifestyle — an attitude, a perspective, an orientation for living that enables us to govern our lives and steer clear of bondage.” She goes on to say, “Sabbath margin is the boundary God intended for us to place around the things we enjoy so that we’ll never be a slave to anyone or anything other than Him.” When I went through her study last year, I was immediately convicted about numerous areas of my life where I had allowed myself to be enslaved to either things I enjoyed or by the expectations set upon me from other people. Whether your time is eaten up by things you love or activities you feel pressured to do, anything that prevents you from having the margin in your life to obey the Holy Spirit on a daily basis should be cut back or eliminated. When we cram all our “rest” into Sundays, versus making it a daily lifestyle, we squeeze out the room for God to show up all week long. If you don’t have any margin in your daily schedule, you won’t have any space for God to bless you. Galatians 5:1 says, "For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.” 

2. Entrust your time to God and then let Him take care of your reputation. I used to wear the badge of busyness with pride. When I began to recognize that my true worth was found in yielding my time to the leading of the Holy Spirit, versus my desire to please others or get things checked off my list, obeying the command to add Sabbath margin into my life became easier little by little. However, my deep-seated desire to be viewed as an over-achiever has been much harder to release. Jesus wasn’t worried about being regarded for his accomplishments or success. He came to serve and obey His Father’s instructions (John 5:19-20 and Romans 15:8-9). In the same way, we are to do our Father’s bidding and let Him worry about how we’re perceived. Paul also shunned any concerns over his reputation. Galatians 1:10 says, "For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” 

3. Have faith in the Biblical principle of multiplication. One of the many reasons to read and study the Bible is to know and feel confident in the character of our loving, heavenly Father. Over and over throughout the Bible, God makes it clear that He will take care of us when we give up something to Him or in His name. When the widow at Zarephath obeyed and gave up her grain and oil to serve Elijah (1 Kings 17:7-24), God blessed her pantry so that her supplies never ran out again during the famine. In Exodus 16, when the Israelites gave up their temptation to collect extra manna for the Sabbath, God miraculously multiplied their portion so that no one went hungry. In Malachi 3:10, God tells us to test him with the giving of our tithes and offerings and He will “open the windows of heaven” for us. The disciples witnessed the principle of multiplication in Matthew 14:13-21 when Jesus miraculously fed thousands with five loaves of bread and two small fish. Our time is no less valuable than our tithe, but many people struggle to let go of the addiction of busyness to generate breathing room for God to move in their lives. But God’s character is something you can count on every time. If you draw healthy boundaries around the stuff and tasks in your life, effectively making your life more flexible for God’s interventions, He will multiply what’s needed to ensure that He is glorified and you are taken care of. 

4. Get comfortable saying no with love and grace. Drawing boundaries around a blessing that has turned into an over-indulgence is hard, but telling someone else no is borderline traumatic for some people. But through the power of the Holy Spirit, we can grow in strength every time we practice saying no. 2 Timothy 1:7 says, “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” When we step out in faith on that promise, God will always be faithful to help us through the discipline of saying no, whether it’s a volunteer opportunity that’s not a good fit, a promotion at work that would negatively impact your family, or limiting how much time you spend on social media or watching TV. Whenever God prompts you to say no in order to leave margin for Him to interrupt your day or spend more time resting in His presence, He will always provide you with a way to obey Him (1 Corinthians 10:13). It may not be easy, but He wants us to depend on Him for the strength, grace and wisdom to follow His leading.

As a recovering perfectionist who has always struggled to stop and enjoy God’s blessings in my life, I still wrestle with needless busyness. But when that familiar frantic feeling creeps into my day, I recall something the Holy Spirit once whispered to my soul: Things don’t have to be perfect to be incredible. My house doesn’t have to be pristine and tidy if it means I am not able to sit and enjoy the presence of family or friends. If guided by the Lord, the words of my blog don’t have to come out perfect to strike a chord in someone’s heart. If the work piles up, I don’t have to get everything done in one night — God will help me get it all done in the right time if I honor Him first with my commitments and boundaries. Jesus gently but firmly corrected his dear friend Martha to stop and rest when she started wearing the badge of busyness. In Luke 10:38-42, He told her that her sister had chosen the “better portion” by sitting and listening to Jesus rather than preparing for and serving their guests. Each day, you and I also have the option to choose the better portion… to leave breathing room for the movement of the Holy Spirit to change the course of our day. Some days it may be harder to do than others, but those moments are blessings within themselves because they teach us to depend on God and His mercies even more. And the more we depend on Him, the less we’ll be in the way of His amazing plans.
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Every now and then we wake up to a different world from the night before. When we went to bed yesterday evening, things might have been normal, stable, or even occasionally boring. But upon rising the next day, we wake to find out someone or something has changed suddenly, forever altering the course of their lives, ours, or both. A phone call you would never want to receive. A breaking newscast you would never want to see. A routine doctor’s visit that turns into an unexpected concern. A heated or hurtful disagreement with a trusted co-worker, friend or family member. It’s these kinds of upheavals that shake us out of our comfort zones, reveal our delusions, and threaten to create fissures in our faith. 

In every one of life’s disturbing moments, we have the opportunity to view everything that happens through the lens of a belief in a sovereign and loving God, or through our own human perspective. Of course, the problem that confronts every single one of us — from pastors to atheists — is our humanity itself. The human experience is all we naturally know or can understand. It is all we can physically see, touch, and manipulate. Sure, for some, an experience with the supernatural occurs. For others, a belief that miracles are possible comes more easily. But for the vast majority of people, we are indelibly marked with the limitations of our physical existence and struggle mightily to trust a God we cannot see during times of suffering, waiting on the unknown, grief, or extreme disappointment. 

Ironically, what we each struggle with the most can vary wildly from person to person, yet the ultimate effects on our faith and trust are universally similar. One person may be the most shaken by a health crisis, but weathers extreme financial hardship with relative ease. Another may worry excessively about relationships and pleasing others, but doesn’t fret a moment about going through a job layoff. Yet no matter what particular issue scares you or worries you the most, the challenge is the same: how to trust God and effectively receive His supernatural peace and contentment in any type of hardship or struggle. 

Our Natural Inclinations Deceive Us
Perhaps most disheartening is when we think we’ve made progress in our greatest area of "trust weakness,”and then our world is shaken in a way that sends us back to the edge of a downward spiral of doubt, fear, worry and future-tripping. “But, God, I thought I was past this,” we often plead in prayer. And this is it — this is the big moment. This is the place where we are at the most pivotal and potentially amazing point in our journey of faith. Sadly, though, many of us pivot the wrong way. The way we are naturally inclined to go… deep into a pit. Our biological capacity to reason, analyze, speculate, and wonder starts literally screaming at us. Humans do not tolerate the unknown or discomfort easily. The mind is inclined to nag and nag until it can find relief or determine the answer. And because it’s all we physically know, it simply feels like the right action to take. So the pit of worry, despair, anger or discontentment is often lined with shelves stocked with counterfeit “products” promising comfort and peace, like denial, over analysis, future-tripping, wallowing in the past, over-eating and junk food indulgence, drinking too much, gossiping, working too much, and whatever else seems to make us feel temporarily better or helps us forget about our problems. 

And there’s one additional thing that bombards us during difficult times — temptation. The enemy of God knows that when we are at the pivot point in times of crisis, we are prime targets to be tempted by false comforts and counterfeit peace. And if he can use any of those tricks to hook us for long-term, then he’ll do it. So if these pivot points represent such great danger, why does God allow them in our lives? If He is sovereign and loves us, why doesn’t He always and instantly flood us physically with His supernatural peace and contentment instead of permitting us to struggle with finding it during times of hardship and mental distress? 

Natural Creation vs. the New Creation
Put simply, it’s because our loving Father wants us to learn to pivot toward Him and away from the natural inclinations we have toward the pit. Yes, of course, He could supernaturally turn us toward Him. And there are times where that will happen in life. But He created us with a free will to choose to turn to Him. We can choose to trust Him and love Him… or not. The Bible makes it clear that God created us in His image to have fellowship with Him, not to be robots who only love Him because we have to do so. And this is the paradox of the gift of free will: we can choose to remain in our naturally flawed sinful human state, or we can pursue His promise that when we pivot toward Him we will be a new creation as promised in 2 Corinthians 5:17. 

The trouble with our perspective is that we can only see through the eyes of natural creation. It is not possible to experience the reward of supernatural peace and contentment without first making the choice to pivot toward being a new creation. This is why Paul tells us in Hebrews 11:1 that the essence of faith is believing in something we cannot see. Our natural state wants instant gratification. We want to feel the promised peace before we take the risk of trusting. God says we need to make the choice to trust Him, obey what He has asks us to do (i.e. not to worry), and THEN He’ll shower us with the supernatural peace and contentment we need to endure the hardship, learn from the experience, grow in our faith, and then love others by helping them through similar struggles. Later in that same chapter of Hebrews, Paul gives detailed examples of faith put into action before the actual promises were fulfilled. From Abraham leaving his homeland to Rahab courageously putting her life on the line for strangers, we are assured that God’s promises are always fulfilled, even when we can’t see or fathom how with our own minds.  

Temptations and Promises are Mirror Images of Each Other
I don’t think a single one of us would give into the temptation of worry, anger, bitterness, resentment, despair, etc., if we could experience the real consequences of those sins BEFORE we choose to give in. Even though a temptation may be familiar, it will always be enticing because it appears to offer relief, peace, comfort or pleasure. And our natural minds gravitate toward anything that provides instant gratification versus hard work. Temptations are Satan’s counterfeits of God’s promises. And just like God’s promises, the real impact of indulging in those temptations can’t be experienced before we actually commit the sin. Of course, the real impact of God’s promises is always for our good. The real impact of sin is always to our detriment. Temptations — whether they come from within ourselves or from Satan — are designed to lure us without any resistance and obscure the consequences. That is the very nature of their structure and intention. God’s promises are designed to teach us to love Him better and they clearly declare the rewards of doing so. In either case — temptation or promise — we don’t experience the ultimate outcome until we’ve actually committed the act. 

God Gives Us Choices in Order to Bless Us
There is no greater love than what our Father has for us. He gave up a part of Himself in the person of Jesus to ensure that we can make a choice for eternity with Him forever. We can freely choose to love Him, and the more we learn to love Him, the more we will experience glimpses of our eternal home while we’re here on earth. Jesus said we will have trials of many kinds, but every single one of them —without fail — comes with a choice and a promise for those who pivot in the right direction. I’ve pivoted into the pit countless times. And usually it’s the same pit over and over and over. I am sick and tired of that pit. But each time I choose to pivot away from the pit — even if it’s just for a few minutes, a few days, or even months at a time — the Holy Spirit’s guidance, peaceful presence, and empowerment in my life becomes more consistent. Sometimes, my natural mind doesn’t see the spiritual improvement, it easily forgets how far I’ve come, and reverts back to the old creation in a heartbeat. But the grace of Jesus is boundless and incomprehensible. And He always wants me back. 

King David pivoted into pits. A lot. And yet the Bible calls him “a man after God’s own heart.” He said in Psalm 40:2, "He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.” This is a promise you and I can bank on. There’s no need to spend time blaming yourself when you revert back into a familiar pit. Instead, kick Satan’s guilt and incrimination to the curb, and give a freedom cry at the top of your lungs, “I have a choice to be free of (fill in the blank), and I choose to love and trust Jesus in this moment.” Believe me, you may find yourself asking for forgiveness for not trusting God many times over. The Holy Spirit will certainly convict your heart to make you aware of that sin, but He will never, ever make you feel guilty for coming back to Him. 

Jesus Stood at the Edge of the Pit Too
Trusting in the unseen rewards of God’s promises is hard with human eyes. Jesus never denied that, in fact He was sympathetic to our plight and confirmed His compassion for us over and over while He walked the earth. Even He struggled to the point of sweating drops of blood the night before He was arrested by soldiers in the Garden of Gethsemane. We have a loving Father that has experienced what it’s like to be human in the most excruciating circumstances. The pit Jesus stood on the edge of was the greatest chasm in human history. So next time you’re facing suffering, waiting, and hardships of any kind, arm yourself to pivot away from the pit. God gives us the tools we need to learn and grow if we choose to use them. There is nothing that can come at us, that He doesn’t intimately understand and empathize with. 1 Corinthians 10:13 says, "No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.” In context, this means that when we operate in cooperation with the Holy Spirit, He will give us eyes to see what we cannot, if we believe. Through prayer, studying and memorizing God’s Word, and meditating on His Truths, we become stronger and smarter with each choice we make. None of this means, however, that the pits won’t continue to pop up throughout our lives, but it does mean that we will gradually become more like Jesus was in His ability to overcome them. 

The courage to face our fears and pivot from life's pits is best summed up by the end of Romans Chapter 8. “What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Amen indeed. 
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The expression, “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks,” is one of the oldest in modern English language, dating back to the early 1500s. Apparently the doubt about people’s ability to change is so universal, we have dozens of similar expressions across the world and throughout history, like “a leopard can’t change his spots” from the Bible, or “you can’t teach an old monkey how to pull a funny face” from France, or “an old parrot can’t learn to speak” from Spain.

Clearly, most people are more comfortable using animal references to make a joke about their assessment of a person than they are directly addressing the issue. It’s just easier to try and laugh it off than to ponder whether or not we truly believe that a person who frustrates us or has hurt us in the past can really “turn over a new leaf,” to use another common euphemism. (Sorry, I couldn’t resist!)

Many times, we find ourselves falling into one of two mental camps when it comes to the people in our lives, depending on how important they are to us. For some who irritate us or have offended us in the past, we may prefer to avoid thinking about them, their ability to change or not, and simply do our best to evade situations or discussions that may spark certain reactions or behaviors. For others, particularly those who mean the most to us, we can go to the other extreme and spend WAY too much time overanalyzing their words and actions. We constantly try to read between the lines of what they’re saying, or sometimes we don’t let them finish talking because we already think we know what they’re going to say.

Both mental camps are not only unhealthy for us, they are also not where God calls us to hang out.

Unfortunately, I have spent way too much time in both places throughout my life. I have gone out of my way to avoid someone who I don’t believe will ever change, and I have believed the worst about someone based on my own very inaccurate perceptions and erroneous assumptions. I have been known to interrupt someone when I think I know what they’re going to say based on their past behaviors. I have created all kinds of reasons in my mind why someone has or hasn’t done something, and I have assumed that someone doesn’t like me or is angry with me based only on a fleeting look. And all of these barely scratch the surface!

I share all of this so that you know this message is from someone who’s right there in the trenches of life with you. Loving people as God commands us to do so is hard, hard work. John 13:34 says, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” And the fact that we are creatures of habit, often makes that calling even harder. We know our own propensity for bad habits and thoughts, so we make the erroneous assumption on a consistent basis that likewise someone else is acting out of habit or thinking the same way they always do.

In the classic book, Loving God With All Your Mind, Elizabeth George deals with the issue of not believing what other people say or doubting that people can — and do — change. In 1 Corinthians 13, she highlights two convicting principles when it comes to loving others by God’s definition. Verse 5 says love “keeps no record of wrongs” and verse 7 says it “always trusts.” Other translations say love “always believes.” Whenever we make assumptions about what another person says or does, we not only violate these principles of loving them as Jesus would, we stress ourselves out. In a sense, when we question what someone is saying, we are calling him or her a liar in our hearts. By not taking what they say as true and at face value, we are placing ourselves in a position of analysis and judgment, and trying to give ourselves a responsibility that only the Holy Spirit has. We cannot read people’s hearts, minds and motives — no matter how smart, intuitive, and experienced we are. And when we try to do that, we malign them, we cause ourselves emotional stress, and we erode the foundation of trust between us. Imagine how sincere our relationships would be and what good listeners we would become if we spent time truly hearing what another person says to us instead of automatically filtering their words and actions through past mistakes or behaviors.

Philippians 4:8 tells us to think about, or dwell on, only things that are true. That means things that we know are verifiable and clearly true. Not what we speculate. Not what we infer. Not what we imagine. And perhaps, most importantly, not dredging up what happened in the past and assuming that it the same as what’s happening right now. Paul further encourages us to press on in our effort to pursue the Gospel and specifically to forget the past (Philippians 3:12-14). In everything, we are to be forward-looking, believing that God is continually working in us, in others, and in our circumstances to make us new creations for His glory.

Now, I’m sure someone reading this is wondering about discernment. What about wisely protecting yourself from someone who’s repeatedly hurt you? What about someone who has deluded themselves and does say things that aren’t true? Are we supposed to listen to them?

This is where it is critical to understand the difference between Spirit-guided discernment and self-centered judgment. Life presents us with all kinds of complicated situations and relationships, and each of them needs to be approached by praying, studying scripture, and seeking wise counsel when needed. That being said, at the most fundamental level, we can boil the difference between judging others and Godly discernment down to a humble attitude and a loving approach. Martin Luther said that we should preach the Gospel to ourselves daily, in that we are all sinners in need of grace. If our motivations lie anywhere outside of complete humility and love, then we are in danger of judgment. When we have to say something difficult to someone based on what is true, we are not only called to treat them with the same kind of love Jesus did, but also model His humility in our approach. Sure, there are the rare occasions where it wouldn’t be healthy for you, or someone who’s hurt you, to continue a conversation or perhaps even continue the relationship. But God’s word gives explicit instructions in Matthew 18 on how to address conflict and move on in grace. (If you are particularly struggling with a conflict right now, here is ahelpful article that walks through the Biblical process with very practical application.)

For most of life’s daily interactions, however, it really is about acting on what we profess to believe. If we truly believe that God can change people, and if we want to love others like Jesus did, then our actions will reflect that belief. If we truly believe that the Holy Spirit is working in our lives and that our hearts are in His hands, then we can trust that He will take care of what we cannot see, what we do not know, and what people’s true motives are. We only have to yield to the Holy Spirit and let Him give us fresh ears, renewed eyes, and a gentle tongue with every conversation… with our spouses, our kids, our friends, our co-workers, our teammates, our neighbors… simply everyone. Loving others as Jesus did is like changing a leopard’s spots for a human being — it is impossible on our own. But loving others by letting God do the work through us is like teaching an old dog new tricks — it is possible with patience, consistency and repeated obedience.

If you like this blog post, why not invite others to read it and subscribe to my weekly emails? You will be encouraging them and you will be helping me share the love of Christ with others. It’s a win-win!